Loss..

[Cmedic69]

Loss..

Because of my inability to deal with my PTSD I have lost the one thing/person in my life:( that was important to me, and because the kids are not biologically mine I have lost them as well.

I am having a really hard time dealing with this loss. I get to feeling better then I see/think about her or the kids and I'm back to square one. I just spent another 18 days on the psych ward. Getting ready to go to a long term inpatient ptsd program. I am getting to point that I can deal with some of the ptsd issues...the loss of my family is what I am having issues with.

anyway....

Jason

 

[Jimmy1]

Jason, I can empathise with you once again. I had 3 step children with my second marriage and when that dissolved due to PTSD I felt like I had lost everything. We tried to get back together numerous times, but the damage was already done and she was not prepared to deal with my symptomatology for the rest of her life.

Once you have learnt to manage the majority of your symptoms, you will find that people see you as a different person. For example, with me, I stopped yelling 3 years ago. I am a much calmer person, but you know what, I am a different person now and the current me will never be like he used to be. And the new me, as much as I loved my wife of 13 years, does not want to go back to that.

For you though mate, can I ask if you have any biological children of your own and how long you were with your most recent partner???

Jimmy

 

[Cmedic69]

We were together 5yrs, were set to marry this fall. I have one biological son from another marriage

 

[Jimmy1]

I suppose it does not matter if you were with someone for 1 year or 20 years, separation always hurts. Kids will remain true to their parents. I suppose I am fortunate that my son chose to live with me.

It does get better though mate. I know from where you stand at the moment it really hurts, but in a way that is a good thing. I went through an emotional numbness where nothing phased me at all. It just shows that your not a machine and are really human.

I am no therapist mate, I am just trying to let you know that it will get better and the grieving will pass.

Who knows, once you get better your ex might find her way back.

Good luck

 

[anthony]

Yep, two marriages and three boys... rarely get to see any of them any more. Took some years to get a decent grip on all that.