Paul you seem to be cool. I think you have a good attitude. It sounds like you are pretty level headed in finding out about all this and in the way you have chosen to try to deal with it all.. Do not let anyone ever tell you their trauma (from homelife, occupational hazards, etc...) experiences were somehow worse than your own. Pain is Pain and I think that everyone who has pain deserves some validation for having suffered through it no matter what the difference in experience might have been. I am only mentioning this because I am just now realizing that for a while now I have let a few people tell me how much worse their own experiences were and I bought into it as I am early in this whole PTSD recovery thing my own self.....Just wanted to share that one bit of insight I have achieved out of the last 5-6 months. Only 999 more points of light to go!!!
Good knowledge sometimes has a slow pace of travel to get to you in this game Paul.....but you should be cool. Everything will work out. And there are people here who are pretty good at helping. Not really me most of the time and I only say that because I am still very new to trying to understanding my own stuff as I said, but there are other people who have been at this healing thing for a while and if you ask them for help I am pretty sure there will be one or two who will be there to give it.