Ptsd A Lack Of Mental Toughness?

[Meghan87]

I thought I was tough and hid my emotions and like others my life became a mess, I became a mess! my emotions ended up getting the best of me and I put myself through some embarrassment because I was too busy trying to look/be tough ...my pride got in my way... when I realized all of this is when I actually became "tough" or strong as I like to say, I was strong enough to face my demons head on and I am defeating them one by one ...now that my friend is tough :)

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Strive for strength, not toughness. There is a great difference between the two.

I see toughness as more of a superficial front. Toughness can be worn on your face, and reflected in your body. Strength, on the other hand, comes from within. Nobody would describe me as "tough" but most would describe me as strong.

Many of us with PTSD aren't tough, but I'd say that all of us are strong. People only see our outward displays of emotion which are interpreted as weakness. The truth is that if these same people had any clue what we actually deal with, they'd know we aren't weak at all.

 

[Meghan87]

Well said! :) I like it!

 

[crazy8]

There's a cognizant-feeling me and then there is my co-pilot Amygdala. He is nuts man. He most of the time is wild eyed and increasing speed to avoid terrifying collisions he once had, and I'm always yelling, Hey! Slow down man, everything is okay now, but he's got control and is deaf as a door knob. I can see all is well but his awareness of the situation and mine are different. He was injured in trauma and thinks it's always happening. Sometimes he knocks me out and I'm in a daze and not quite with it.

Wow - how eloquently stated! I feel like you just cracked open my skull, inspected my brain, and wrote down the perfect analogy of its contents.

 

[Abstract]

So many good responses. Hardness is in no way strongness. In fact I suspect hardness would make someone less resilient. One of the things that makes people most resilient is having strong emotional connections to others from early on. Our social connections and humanity actually protects us. It's why we find healing coming to places like this and support groups. It's also why interpersonal trauma is so harmful.

Your humanity is a great strength and is what sets you aside from those who are inhuman.

 

[Britt.f7]

I grew up with a mother who was always pushing me to be tough, and a sister who was "tough". I really do not, to this day, think they are any stronger then I am. I think it is much tougher to feel things through. To work it out. Going through this PTSD is not a weak mans journey.

 

[maryiscontrary]

Well this "toughness" is nothing but a cover for avoidant or dismissive attachment style, no?

Yes, my toughness only damaged me mentally and physically because I was so cut off from my body....yeah, "walk it off" ain't so effective on a proverbial shattered leg.