PTSD: Before And After

[ghost]

1. Before PTSD, you used to go to work each day and spend hours sitting at a desk with your IBM.

Now, you go to the bathroom each day and spend hours sitting on the toilet with IBS.

2. Before PTSD, on a Friday night you would have a few drinks at home, before heading out and lining up outside the door of a club.

Now, you have a few dozen drinks at home, while sitting in front of your door, holding a club.

3. Before PTSD, you could not walk through town without attracting the attention of the men you passed.

Now, you cannot walk through town without attracting the attention of the police.

4. Before PTSD, you indulged in hours of weekly pleasure, joined to your lover in the missionary position.

Now, you endure days of immeasurable torment, joined to your pillow, in the foetal position.

5. Before PTSD, you used to take a little valium to help you chill out; de-agitate, and relax.

Now, you take a lot of valium, so you don’t flip out; hyper-ventilate, and collapse.

 

[Manic11]

Hahaha. I like number 2. :occasion:

Manic

 

[suzie q]

Yep, there's that amazing ghost again! You do tend to pop in and out like a ghost, but always with amazing ways to look at our pain train!!

Keep that train chuggin there ghost...lol

 

[helena]

Before PTSD you gave £50 to the beggar on the corner - now he gives it to you

 

[anni]

Ha!

The number 2 is awesome! It made me think back to the days when I actually DID that. I still have my riding crop on top of the mirror by the door. I grab it and my keys before heading out the door. :) I have to say I do pity the person who tries to make me a victim again.

Plus-
Before PTSD you recycled all your beverage cans. Now you build them into nice little pyramids in front of all the windows so you'll know when 'they' are coming.

Cool thread, thank you!

Take care,

Anni

 

[Dylan]

Ha! Great one, Helena!

Another funny thread, Ghost. It's feels good to laugh at this thing....thanks. :smile:

-Dylan

 

[logan]

You fogot one
Before use to kick back and relax with a few and watch a moive on the DVD player

Now you curl up and belt quite few and wish the DvD player in your head would stop

 

[Manic11]

I still have my riding crop on top of the mirror by the door. I grab it and my keys before heading out the door. :) I have to say I do pity the person who tries to make me a victim again.

Haha! I used to use my riding crop as a weapon too! My brother never thought it would hurt. Used to make fun of me all the time. Then he smacked himself with it....From then on he never came near me when I had that thing!
:rofl:

Manic

 

[shiraz]

I didn't expect that ghost .... lol .... I needed an unexpected laugh!

 

[helena]

Before u had ptsd women invited you to select dinner parties - now they issue a restraining order

 

[anni]

Riding crops are awesomely effective little items to have around. I have never used it on a horse that way, of course. It's just an aid when riding. BOY would it inflict some damage with some heat behind it.

Your poor brother! Ouch! He must have been REALLY surprised!! :)

Take care,

Anni

 

[BassistKara]

Hehe i love this thread! Definitely needed the laugh right about now as well! :)