Self Blame As A Default Mode For Those With Ptsd From Combat, Medical Or Accidents?

[Abstract]

I ask this to try to understand myself more. I keep wondering if those who have PTSD that isn't related to abuse have this issue of always blaming themselves in so many areas of their lives. And the distrust of people.

I wonder if it is purely a default from others indoctrinating us and from growing up in an environment where we are always responsible for others feelings or if some of this comes directly from PTSD itself. I want to have more understanding of others experience of PTSD as I think it will help me understand mine more. And so that I can have more understanding of it in general.

My symptoms are delayed onset but I have little clear memory or had little self awareness so I can't even compare properly for myself.

Not sure if I am missing something obvious or not. :confused:

 

[Abstract]

Just wanted to add that mine is from childhood stuff.

 

[DharmaGirl]

I don't know. Mine is childhood stuff too. It would be interesting to find out.

 

[Abstract]

Thanks Monster. I feel a bit shy about asking but want to know.

 

[Privateer]

I do. I mean, my problems stem mostly from my own feelings about our inability to save certain people and my part in that, so self-blame is absolutely central to the whole mess.

 

[Abstract]

Thanks Privateer for answering. :)

I can totally see how that would happen and am sorry. It sounds very painful.

What I wondered though is if everything causes this type of self blame internally. So for an example you never had this issue, had your accident and now if someone treats you disrespectfully at work your internal instinct is to start berating yourself or feeling self hating even though you have no need to and it is the other person that is at fault. I don't know if that makes sense.

 

[Abstract]

I our inability to save certain people and my part in that,

Its amazing how we always seem to come out of things finding some inventive way to take responsibility for the trauma. Its saddening.

 

[Privateer]

Unfortunately, in my case, there was a very real possibility that the actions of me and my team could have caused the deaths of those people. I mean, we did everything we could, but so much in our work is a judgement call and you won't know if you got it right until later on.

It was two days before we were certain that what we had done was right and that those people had been beyond our help from the beginning. It was those two days that did the damage; for those two days I was convinced we'd left them out there to die.

 

[KP the nut]

Mine was a car crash, and yes, I blamed myself although the police officer told me that 'there was nothing I did, or could have done differently to avoid what happened'.

I took comfort in those words, but I still blamed myself, like I deserved what happened :confused:

 

[Britt.f7]

I'm not sure if mine is related to that or if it was just how I was raised.

I know, after my friends died in a horrible accident when I was seven(though not ptsd related), I do have survivors guilt every time someone I love dies. I still carry the guilt from when my friends died.

 

[JustBe]

Hmmm...good thread. ;) I'm gonna chew this one over for a bit before I reply.

 

[kodiak]

Mine was losing my fiancee in a car accident and not being able to save her I still blame myself everyday.:(