The Flashbacks I've had at night for year have taken over my life

new gamma rays

Bronze Member
I was essentially abducted from my house by an ambulance crew ordered by my parents many years ago. The fact it happened in my house, and that I have never gotten away, means that nearly everything remotely connected to that event is a major trigger of flashbacks. I've been trying to manage that by avoiding a lot of the major sensory triggers, to the point of almost leaving on no lights because those are the major sensory triggers. But now I've grown more and more sensitive to my triggers, and it is now extremely hard to stop the flashbacks once they get going. I just keep remembering that night in greater detail and I know that makes it worse. I don't know how to stop this train - I spend more of my night in flashbacks or dissociation than not. And as this was done by my parents the emotions connected to it are pretty out of control. I live almost in dread of my nights.. There are a few things that help me ground, but it feels like my brain is determined to remember each phase of that night whether that will help me or not. Other than GTFO of this house, does anyone have any advice for controlling flashbacks that keep getting worse?
 
But now I've grown more and more sensitive to my triggers
That’s why avoiding triggers and stressors never works, long term; they get WORSE, instead of better.

In the short term, like I need to get XYZ done this afternoon? Avoidance works great, which is why it can sucker people in. But in the long term? Triggers and stressors get worse, and worse, and worse; the consequences to them (panic attacks, flashbacks, symptom spikes in general) get worse, and worse, and worse; so one’s life & world get smaller, and smaller, and smaller.

Other than GTFO of this house, does anyone have any advice for controlling flashbacks that keep getting worse?
GTFO MIGHT help??? But it’s not guaranteed, even in the short term, because of how avoiding triggers & stressors just makes them worse… and you’re already doing badly. More likely, your brain would simply attach all the triggers & stressors you deal with now, to the new place. If you were doing really well, moving would probably buy you some time to work on those triggers and stressors, but that’s all it would be; bought time. They’d still attach to the new place. It would just take longer.

INSTEAD, I’d very strongly suggest that you start working on eliminating the triggers & stressors, rather than avoiding them.

There are 2 ways to do that, with PTSD
- Root Cause (trauma processing), which is top down, by cutting off the head of the snake.
- Exposure Therapy, which is bottom up, targeting individual triggers and stressors, chipping away at them until they’re polished so smooth they no longer provoke any kind of reaction, whatsoever.

Personally, I tend to make a double list of the triggers & stressors that are impacting my life the most <<< (baseline criteria for both lists).

1. Big, bad, gnarly, & gonna take me a while to sort (months and longer).
2. Annoying little f*ckers, easily sorted within a few days/weeks.

That way I get a LOT of traction by ticking off lots and lots of little simple ones, for every big complicated one. But everyone has their own personal preferences in what to tackle, and in what order, for the best effect on them & their lives.

Some reading for you

 
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