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The Hardest Thing About Being A Grandparent....

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AngelKeeperJ

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Keeping my mouth shut! There are things I would do SO differently, but I've learned to keep my mouth shut. I think I learned pretty quickly...my granddaughter is 16 months old.

My biggest pet peeve. Telling a child they are "bad" when they are doing something unacceptable. Especially at her age! The child is always a good child, the actions are bad!

My second 'gripe'...LOL...Mommy spends LOTS of time on the computer, and they 'park' "Little V" in front of a DVD player with language lessons. All seems well and good, but I get down on the floor and play with her. They aren't born knowing how to play with toys. It is a good thing to keep these things to myself. I'm sure she will turn out fine.
 
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Reading this reminds me of my situation, although being almost completely opposite!

My half brother was born when I was sixteen, so I saw all the parenting methods my mum used on him, but could never say anything when I disagreed with what she was doing, because obviously she knew best... (It's quite complicated, I would spend more time with him than her as she was visiting my step dad in prison a lot), so I learnt how to comfort him and such quite well... Even if I didn't ever quite get the grasp of doing a nappy change... They just never seamed to go right!

It's good that you are around to spend time with your granddaughter, tv is great for many things, but human interaction isn't one of them!
 
TV in moderation isn't bad. However, I heard those kiddie DVDS don't really do much because they talk down to children. My mom had me watching soap operas as a kid---err, more like baby and toddler, and credits it with my advanced verbal skills at a young age. (It was the early 80's, we had 2 channels, lol)
 
My biggest pet peeve. Telling a child they are "bad" when they are doing something unacceptable. Especially at her age! The child is always a good child, the actions are bad!

Yes, yes, yes! I so agree with you on the "actions are bad" not the child!

I worked with pre-school thru 4th grade children in the public schools for many years. I would tell the child that was acting in unacceptable behavior that what they were doing was "Not OK to behave in this way". NEVER telling them that THEY were bad. ALWAYS followed by POSITIVE reinforcement of how they needed to use their words to express what they needed or what was bothering them.

A 16 month old child is NOT bad. Children need to be spoken to in a Positive way to help them understand what is acceptable and what is not.
 
My boss once made me laugh - she said that she is a member of the "Bad Grandma Club" because she and her friends all sit and drink tea and compare stories about how badly their grandchildren are being brought up - she once told me that her grandson's favourite tv programme was the 10:00pm news... he was 18 months old!

I think some of it is generational (I'm in my 30s but quite traditional in my ways) and some of it is that some people just don't know how to get on down there and play. I'm an only child, have no children of my own and would find it quite alien to try and do it. Husband on the other hand is an absolute natural!

I am sure she will work it out and your grandaughter will be fine - she has you looking out for her xxx
 
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