Sexual Assault Upcoming intrusive medical exams

[Lissar]

I have multiple intrusive tests coming up. The first is a rectal exam that will be done by a male doctor who I’ve never met and who has bad reviews online. The next will be a transvaginal ultrasound. Then an HSG (tube inserted into cervix to flood uterus and fallopian tubes with contrast dye while having X-rays). After that, a colonoscopy. I struggle with dissociation and somatic flashbacks.

Looking for any advice on how to get through so many extremely triggering exams, or just comfort and reassurance.

 

[Sues]

Hi Lissar, I've been through the same stuff, and I also disassociate. I worked with my therapist on this a lot before I went to my appointments. I told the receptionist about my history of SA and other trauma, but it was not passed on. When I arrived, I had to tell the technician who was doing the transvaginal ultrasound. It was really hard to verbalize, but she was super accommodating and helpful. I did my breathing during the entire time and used visual imagery to help me. It sucked, but I got through it. I've also had to have several other triggering appointments and exams due to uterine cancer and a hysterectomy. So it's been an ongoing struggle for a few years.

Do you have anything that helps you ground yourself? It helped me to tell the tech beforehand. I told her to keep going unless I told her to stop, even if I was crying. But that's how I wanted to do it. She was willing to stop and take breaks if I needed.

 

[Movingforward10]

What has helped me is the following:
Remembering I have autonomy and can say no and stop at any point.
Having a care plan and carrying it out. For example what works for me: the medical person talking with me about what they are doing and going to do to next. None of this talking about holidays and pretending they aren’t doing something to me when they are.
Getting them to not stand over me.
Checking with me at each stage that I remain consenting to this.
Being able to wash and clean myself after so I leave clean.


What would work for you?
What would be ideal for you and how can you achieve it?


Words of reassurance: I recently had the transvaginal ultrasound and it went well. I don’t share my trauma with the people, but explain what I need from them. And I took my time, took my space and did what I needed. Wasn’t triggered at all. I just felt sad and a couple of tears came out, and the person checked in on me, I just remained connected to my body and it got better.
Something my T said to me that helped about this was “ something can be hard but it doesn’t mean it will be traumatic”, which helped me open up a possibility that i wouldn’t be retraumatised through the examination.