What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

[Philippa]

Now I feel calm...the dismal, down in the dumps mood has finally passed.

 

[Philippa]

And I just realized...frightened?

 

[intothelight]

Trying to pick up the pieces ...................again.

 

[Iam]

I knew it was happening from the very start, and I stood up for myself, thinking it would stop if I just kept standing up for myself and calling him out when he did it. I still do, and he still insists that I need to develop my humor. I know what I find funny and I tell him that his jokes aren't funny to me and that what he says is hurtful...and he just rolls his eyes and laughs if I say it's emotional abuse.

I could have written your whole post Philippa. I am sorry that you are putting up with this. My husband did that. It didn't start until after we were married though. I started calling him on it and standing up for myself from day one. It never helped. I got the same replies...."I was only joking, you need a better sense of humor." As time went on, people who got close to us started commenting on it to me. People genuinely like my husband, but they didn't like the way he treated me. Standing up for myself at least kept me from letting him make me feel bad about myself, but it didn't help my healing from childhood abuse.

All that to say.....we have been married 33 years and I think he finally gets it. I wouldn't recommend that anybody stick around that long. If he had been that way before we got married I would hope that I would have broken it off with him. As it is, we have 3 grown sons, a wonderful daughter in-law and 3 beautiful granddaughters. I am glad we were able to work things out, but if I had it to do over again, knowing what I know now......I would have made him go to counseling with me and if he didn't change I would have divorced him.

It's such a personal decision, so I am not giving advice at all Philippa. I'm just sharing what happened to me so maybe it will help you decide what you need to do.

(((HUGS)))

 

[Iam]

Trying to pick up the pieces ...................again.

And you will pick them up Deb. You are strong, a fighter and survivor. Wish I could give you a great big hug.
BTW.....love your new avatar.......is that the way up to heaven?

 

[ISupportHer]

Tired. Physically and emotionally

 

[Tinyflame]

I give up.

 

[Heather]

Emotionally and physically exhausted, sad, depressed

 

[Iam]

Tired. Physically and emotionally

Hugs ISH and to you too Junebug and Heather.

I wonder how much the post holiday blues affect me. I was feeling much better until Monday. Though I must admit that I still feel fairly well in comparison to a couple of months ago.......so that is what I will hold onto.

 

[KP the nut]

Shattered, lousy night last night, EMDR today. Scared, trapped. Want to go to bed but scared in case the demons come again instead of sleep:(

 

[Philippa]

Thanks. I definately won't be sticking around for years and years waiting for him to get it through his meaty head:D

I appreciate your story though. It's such a tough one to know how to respond or what to do. You can't change the person. He's a nice guy in some ways and has been there for me...he just doesn't seem to get that what he is saying is hurting me.

 

[deer_in_headlights]

Saw the Orthopedic Dr. today.
He said, "Does THIS hurt?"
OWWWWWWWW!!!!

So, now I hurt....