What Does "processing Trauma" Really Mean?

[Abstract]

I agree with MD. Someone once said to me that different aspects of the trauma can arise at different times. So new things can be revealed and it is essentially a new opportunity for deeper healing. Thats the way I choose to look at it anyway. Thats what I think is happening for you Ms Spock.

And like MD said I think the healing we have done in the past stands. It sometimes doesn't feel like it because other aspects can feel so awful. It surprises me how disconnected different aspects of healing can be from each other. Some can be much better and others much worse. Depression has been like that for me too. Its as if each bout of clinical depression I have had has it's own unique flavour. I hope all that makes some sense.

 

[ms spock]

That is very helpful Maddog and Abstract. I hadn't thought about it that way.

 

[ms spock]

I worked on my attachment issues this morning with my psychiatrist. That was really good. Sad. I was able to link some of my traumas to things. I have lost people because I over expected - I was coming from a child state wanting a parent's love. You can't expect that as an adult.

 

[Changing4Best]

I have lost people because I over expected - I was coming from a child state wanting....

Thanks, I needed this reminder! I have over-expected from my new friend this week. I need to apologize to her. I did not get angry, I cried! I am a bit embarrassed now...

 

[maddog]

This is a really interesting flipside to the whole issue of expectation and emotional need. While often those of us who have experienced considerable emotional abuse and neglect, expect and accept not enough from others, I think there is also the potential to fall to the other extreme of the spectrum, and to idealise certain people, or to have difficulty "regulating down" the need and expectation once those instincts have been awakened in us. Getting that balance right is something that is beyond me at the moment, and I know at times that I feel intense, almost frantic, and most definitely childlike disappointment in people, often then snapping back to the other extreme and then expecting and accepting nothing from them.

Experiencing and recognizing emotions and needs is a huge step. But regulating them is the next step, and often I think it's even harder.

Maddog

 

[ms spock]

I am processing the trauma by upping my exercise, activity and social interaction and continuing despite the increased anxiety. It is because I don't remember lots of stuff I have to work through the emotions, sometimes only roughly knowing where they come from. I am finding this hardgoing.

I wish every one extra strength and courage in their journey with processing their traumas.

 

[Changing4Best]

I think some of the things I am doing here on this Forum, like THE HAPPINESS CHALLENGE are actually helping me to process the trauma, and I might add without a lot of suffering.

 

[therapybankrupt]

The therapist and I were going over cleaning out the trauma. Cleaning out the tubes that are all connected to the trauma is very important. It may take several sessions to clean out. A sure fire way I know it is working I feel like puking. She always brings over the garbage can but I have never thrown up. Usually a fairly loud burp sneaks out at the end. My Therapist said that I am one of many patients that have that experience when doing processing. Grieving during processing is almost always the most exhausting for me. She has suggested I see a Chakra healer. Any one done this?

 

[franciemarnie]

Right before I release trauma energy, trauma emotion, I get very cold in my chest. It feels like I have a dark dank cave in there and then I start shaking like I am freezing. At first, I automatically put a coat on or a blanket but it didn't help at all because the cold is inside me. I was freaked out at first, but when I realized what was happening and I was releasing what had long been stored, I was very glad.

Sometimes I cry. Sometimes I don't. Lots of times I get up and walk back and forth and move my arms around.

It was weird too because what I would be talking about when this happened night be something I talked about with no sensation for years, but evidently somehow came a point where it could be felt and let go.

Other times, like right now, I wake up with the cold cave yawning open and I don't know why or what it is related to. Maybe I had a dream. I don't remember. Maybe it is related to something from yesterday. Maybe it is my body's wisdom and I need to be mindful and do meditation and see what's up.

I want to release whatever has been stored there that wants to come out but it is unsettling sometimes.

I am interested in the chakra experience too. Since I will try anything that isn't harmful to heal, I read up on it and have tried doing it myself with no obvious results thus far. I can imagine a couple of mine would be especially clogged!!

Great thread.

 

[franciemarnie]

I have also felt like Therapybankrupt in feeling about ready to puke sometimes. For me, when I get that overwhelming sure I'm going to vomit nausea, which tends to come with a horrible headache and pain in my feet, I will usually cry my little heart out. And when it's over, no more pain.

I lived like I was made of wood for so many years that all these feelings are at the very least, really unsettling sometimes.

I like that it all comes pouring out because I feel so much better then, but talk about exhausting! Sheesh!

 

[LizardViolet]

I am very grateful for this thread. Thank you so much for sharing.

 

[therapybankrupt]

Getting that balance right is something that is beyond me at the moment,

Mad dog I am so with you on this. The balance of expectations for me swing. I am thought about it and wondered if it some how is connected with black and white thinking and when I do that I can keep the expectation of others and what to expect from my self more realistic.

which tends to come with a horrible headache and pain in my feet,

Francimarrnie have you ever tried using visualization and breathing to relieve the pain in your feet? Some believe there are also chakras in your lower body. Go to You Tube and look up guided chakra meditation by Jody Whitely. If I remember correctly she asks you to release the negative energy in your feet. Imagine it emptying out the bottoms of your feet. If you feel burning or tingling it could be because we are holding hatred or malice against others.

I know when my feet hurt before bed I do this and it relieves the pain all night. The breathing helps me release negative energy that traps in my head, neck and other parts of my body. I take a deep breath and imagine the negative energy pain and where it is located. Hold for a few seconds. Then take a long slow exhale releasing all the negative energy. Letting it go where ever negative energy goes. Repeat till you are relaxed and the pain is gone.