Relationship When Is Enough, Enough?

[Cult]

The thing is, it has only been this bad for about a month. She WAS much more loving, involved in a shared life with me, and connected to me before she experienced a flashback in early April. Yes, the financial situation has been bad, but we share accountability for that. So I am thinking the PTSD is a huge factor and one I need to make allowances for.

 

[Loloma]

Any relationship is give and take. This one seems to be mainly take. You posted earlier that there was an agreement that she get a job back in 2011. Nothing has happened in that area. If you take the PTSD out of the equation her behavior is bad, and all you seem to be getting is any crumbs she throws your way.

This for you is a very unhealthy way to live. I put up with it for 15 years and it nearly destroyed me. It was very hard for me to leave as I still loved him and suffered badly. Now I live alone and manage on the small amount of money I earn. At least the hurt and the stress are gone.

If you allow your partner to treat you with no respect and not contribute, you get what you settle for. I know that is hard to hear, but I have seen it with other peoples relationships including my own children. Both need to contribute, not necessarily financially but also providing comfort, affection and a stable environment.

 

[Loner]

Sometimes people only change once they lose something.