Why Do I Keep Having Very Violent Nightmares ?

[teff]

I have been having very violent dreams since the age of 12, where I am being violently abused in every way possible (plus I can't scream or move or wake myself up from them).
I know my past doesn't help but I started to get used to them and some how in my dreams started screaming you don't scare me anymore and you can't hurt me. That was the worst thing I have ever done because now instead of me dreaming about me being hurt now its all about my children. And because that scares the hell out of me, I am so scared of going to sleep.

Also what doesnt help is that I've seen doctors, psychiatrist, counselors, and they all say the reason why I'm having these dreams is because I'm depressed and put me on medication that doesn't work. Don't get me wrong, it helps my moods during the day so I'm not snappy at my children because of only having a few hours sleep a night. But it just seems to me no one wants to listen or tell me really what is going on with me or ways to make it easier so I can at least get a few hours sleep with out being scared.

 

[pi314159]

Hi Teff,

I'm definitely no expert on this but I used to have extremely scary nightmares growing up so I understand how hard it is.

I was wondering is there a theme to your dreams, do your dreams relate directly to your PTSD?

 

[joanne]

[quote="teff, post: 276137 Hi. I really identified with your post. I'm a mother of 6 myself. I also struggle with memory loss associated to trauma and like you I am at war with myself most nights. You obviously care very much for your family and that must remain the shining hope. You must be proud that love and compassion for others is so strong. I am not sure what may haved occured in your past, but I am constantly reminding myself that I survived, I am alive, so I will in time find the strenght to face the demons that haunt my nighttimes awake or asleep".[/quote]

 

[jimmy-joe]

Nightmares are generally about things that are upsetting you, or make you afraid. It sounds like your fear for personal safety has been transferred to your children. If you are going to therapy or somesuch, maybe ask about working through your fears for them? And what you can do to increase safety w/o giving them straight jackets :p.

 

[teff]

no there is no theme other than try to hurt me any way possible. i now it is to do with the passed i have had all the help offered and in many ways i feel like ive delt with it because it used to be on my mind and affect my day to day life. Now it dont affect my day to day life just night time.