Anyone Had Good Results With Cue Controlled Relaxation From Dbt

[Sandstone]

This is the first thing in the DBT Workbook I've shied away from
The idea is that I learn to use a word like "relax" to cue me to release muscle tension. Effectively it becomes a positive trigger

It sounds like something beneficial for me. I know I carry lots of physical tension, and I benefit from other forms of relaxation. Yet when I read the description of a warm, soothing light that shines on my head and gradually envelops my body I become anxious, and by the time it has reached

"Notice the soothing sensation of the white light as it moves across your chest and stomach. Feel the muscles in your arms release as the light moves down to your forearm and then across both sides of your hands to your fingertips. Now notice the light moving down through your pelvis and buttocks and feel the tension being released."

I'm quite panicky.
I don't want anything physically enveloping me, it sounds dangerous and threatening.

Yet I can see that if I could do this it would be useful.

My inclination is to say that not everything is for everyone and move on, but I thought I'd ask first if anyone else reacted like this and found a way through.

 

[scout86]

My T has talked about something kind of like that, but not exactly like that. (That sounds kind of creepy BTW) He was talking about relaxing. He doesn't usually get into labeling things, so he doesn't say "This is DBT", or anything like that. So I could be wrong, but it sounded similar.

He started by talking about a kid with test anxiety and how he'd asked the kid to think of a time when he was 'relaxed but confident'. The kid remembered a time, playing football, when he felt like that. Then to try to 'feel' that way in your body. What ever that takes, because it's going to vary. Then he told the kid to combine that feeling with squeezing his knee with his hand. With enough practice, he learned to relax and feel confident due to squeezing his knee with his hand. Like you said, kind of a positive trigger. He said it worked.

I've not been real dedicated to training myself to do it. I HAVE found it useful, when I notice I'm tense, to imagine how I felt in one of those 'relaxed, confident' situations. I've got a situation I use, so I don't have to think about that and it really does help, when I remember to do it.

I think the idea is great, but maybe you need to come up with an image that actually produces the desired result.

 

[Lola Nocheprieta]

I can understand the anxiety and your physiological response, @Sandstone. I feel this way when I try to do guided imagery around the chakras, especially the lower chakra. Focusing on my pelvis/stomach, ie, genital area, brings up a lot of anxiety, fear and sadness for me. I try to work with it, but it's hard. And I do carry a lot of stress and tension in my belly, low back, butt and pelvis.

However, I don't think it's necessary to follow the entire guided imagery throughout your entire body to get some benefit. You want to train your body, literally train muscle memory, to develop the "relaxation response." Can you start with just one part of your body that feels safe? Maybe the neck shoulders, arms and hands? Or the face? Or just your feet? Where do you feel tension that also feels like it would be safe to do this kind of guided imagery, paired muscle relaxation? There are all sorts of relaxation techniques that can help you develop a relaxation response, and some might work better for you than others. Then, when you are ready, you can choose to address those areas of your body that need more care, but don't feel ready for such focused attention just yet.

On the other hand, rather than avoid that area entirely, can you practice some distress tolerance and approach those areas gently? Maybe just spend some time noticing how your pelvis feels, or just breathing into certain body parts. Remind yourself that the feelings of anxiety, fear, panic and danger have a root cause, are understandable and valid, but the feelings themselves cannot hurt you. I'm doing Prolonged Exposure therapy myself right now, so I really know how hard it is to just sit with panic and fear when everything in your mind and body is screaming, "Run away! Danger! Run away!" It's not easy, but sitting with difficult feelings is a distress tolerance skill that can be learned, gets better with practice, and has great benefits over time.

Whatever you decide to do, take care of yourself and give yourself major credit for practicing!

Gentle hugs if you accept them! :hug:

 

[Lola Nocheprieta]

Great alternative, @scout86! I'll have to remember that myself.

 

[Sandstone]

I'm not sure if I'm "allowed" to modify it, or whether I have the take the package as it comes, because it has been worked out for a reason. Has anyone done this as part of a group - do you know?

If I did adapt it, then I could take the end point of either breathing or visualisation exercises and then attach my cue word to that. I don't feel up to approaching it head on yet. I think I need more confidence in my ability to stabilise myself first. That is what these exercises are meant to be for.

 

[EveHarrington]

You can modify any skill as you see fit. Seriously. I mean if the alternate is to throw away the skill altogether, then why not. And, no skill will work for everyone. It's not like these skills have been through something rigorous like drug testing or even any sort of scientific process to "prove" efficacy. If you only take skills as is and don't modify them to be optimal for you, you'll be doing yourself a huge disservice IMHO.

 

[Silver.]

Because I believe in energy, I substitute positive energy for white light.
Would that help you at all?
as Eve said, similar/like modifications to make DBT work better for you are perfectly acceptable
(especially when you consider that each therapist would be working with their client in their own ways of learning and practicing DBT, in the framework, but in their own wording, with their clients)

 

[Friday]

Cue controlled relaxation? Absolutely.

From DBT? Nah. I got it from somewhere else. And it looks wildly different from the DBT method. But it works. And it is fiercely helpful. Instantaneous heart rate drops, breathing drops, muscles become relaxed and fluid, mind clears, bam!

I honestly don't use it as often as I should. But when I'm doing well, it's part of what I'm doing every day. And when I'm doing badly it's part of what helps bring me back to doing well.

So I cannot recommend it (CCR) highly enough.

 

[aut555]

This is the first thing in the DBT Workbook I've shied away from
The idea is that I learn to use a wo...

I would say that a possibility is to try breathing in the white light and it permeates through your entire body displacing the dark energy, and as you breath out the dark energy leaves. So you visualize the white energy going inside down to your toes and back up, down your arms, and back up. This is also meditative and helps with controlled breathing to quiet the mind and relax. So you concentrate on breathing. In brings the white light and breathing out takes out the dark energy stored in your limbs.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

It works for me, and Im triggered by things that are done in a cue. Reminds me of the cult and it still works for me. And any skill can be changed to fit your needs. The image may be different for all.

Ok, so inside of the anxiety app What's Up there's a metaphor of imagining yourself floating on your back on water. Thats the one that works for me. It relaxes ever tense muscle, it slows my heart and breathing and stops the trembling. It takes my anxiety from 100 to 0 fast.

Dont think about it, just try imaging different things in there until you find one that works and relaxes you. Not all are the same and different images work for different people.

 

[Sandstone]

So thanks for the confirmation @EveHarrington @lostforgottensoul that it is OK to modify. I'm a bit rule bound, so it is good to know I can flex this.

There are several imaginary places that can prompt relaxation for me, but I doubt I could make them cue controlled to that extent. So far as I can see, this is meant to be a way to reach a physical goal, rather than a mental one and at the moment that takes a lot of work and focus. I'm sure that none of the approaches that have anything moving through my body are feasible now. My first T, who knew a lot, advised me never to try progressive relaxation. This seems to fall into the same category.

I think I'm going to play around with adding something to the end of other mediations, when I am aware my body is relaxed, and see if I can sneak up on it that way.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

@Sandstone, mine isnt cue controlled like clicker training for a dog...i dont do it on a cue but the two reasons for this is to relax you out of anxiety (the what's Up app) and to self soothe (DBT workbook), make you feel safe in a time you dont. So i do it when i feel my anxiety shooting up (once im at the highest place i cant think enough to do this so i try to catch my anxiety before i loose all abilty to think), in times when I dont feel safe like at night, though at night im imagining something different and playing a fake movie in my head, its still the same thing, imagining.

Maybe thats the "cue", anxiety going up and fear/terror and feeling unsafe?

I practiced in a time that i was ok, to learn what works for me, what relaxed me, and then started to do it in lower anxiety times and once I got it to make a low level of anxiety go away i applied it in the high anxiety times.

For example, I work at a job that calls for people to scream at me constantly. It makes all of me tight and balled up, all of my muscles, my breathing becomes shallow, short, fast, my mind spins and i loose the abilty to think, i tremble, and i snap into "fight back" mode. While the customer is screaming, and i feel all of these "cues" my body is giving me, I am imagining myself floating on my back on water and i feel those tense tight balled up muscles relax, trembling stops, i can breath deeper and slower, and i can think again, my brain stops spinning. Think of "cues" as your body telling you that you need to relax. Makes sense?

ETA: And yes, everything can be changed to fit what you need. Nothing is written in stone like you must do it this way. Its more of a suggestion on how one might do it...you know?