My Son

[Gs172003]

My son is 19 years old. Yet his handwriting is like the first grade. He is very very smart, got a 29 on the act but his writing has never improved. My therapist has said that trauma makes you " stuck " in an age. Could this be a sign of that?

 

[digger]

There can be lots of reasons for 'poor' handwriting, not necessarily relating to emotional age. The one that springs to mind first might be dyspraxia. Something I've noticed with bright children is their handwriting can be scruffier because they have so many thoughts and ideas their hands physically don't keep up with the speed of the stuff in their heads they're trying to get on the paper. It's also important I think to recognise the role of technology in handwriting - children don't get as much practise as we used to as a lot of written work is done via a keyboard.

If he doesn't show signs of being stuck at a younger age in other respects, I wouldn't necessarily attribute his handwriting to that.

 

[Casey_03]

I think you're reading too much into it. This generation doesn't get much practice with handwriting anymore -- it's all on computers now. I'm 31 and even when I was in school, there was much less emphasis on handwriting and a huge focus on typing. As a result, I have terrible terrible handwriting. If he's 19, I imagine there is even less focus on handwriting now ... People just don't write stuff out anymore.

 

[Gs172003]

There can be lots of reasons for 'poor' handwriting, not necessarily relating to emotional age. The one...

It's hard to say as he's basically a hermit though he's slowly improving

 

[Gs172003]

I think you're reading too much into it. This generation doesn't get much practice with handwriting an...

He's always been that way even before everything was done on computers. He has been out of high school for a year now.

 

[Gs172003]

You two are in different countries than me. It wasn't that way until fairly recently here.

 

[Gs172003]

But you all are probably right. It could be nothing. He is definitely traumatized but his handwriting doesn't mean anything.

 

[digger]

He is definitely traumatized but his handwriting doesn't mean anything.

My son is 18. Witnessed some very early domestic violence incidents at age 2 or 3. Shows no sign of recalling any of it or any signs of being traumatised (although I know it's not always evident until something happens to bring it back out). Had very little computer access until about 12 or 13. His handwriting is really messy.
My nephew is 23. No trauma. No dyspraxia. Intelligent. Handwriting illegible!
My brother is 26. No trauma. Possibly some dyspraxia. Intelligent. Handwriting of a ten year old!

So yeah, I'm not saying it definitely isn't to do with trauma in your son's case but I don't think there's a definitive correlation between the two.

 

[Gs172003]

My son is 18. Witnessed some very early domestic violence incidents at age 2 or 3. Shows no sign of reca...

Even his drawing style is that of a five year old. I don't get it

 

[Casey_03]

I'm American, despite the Ukrainian flag on my profile. And I think most of the people I grew up with in the States had terrible handwriting, just like me. I always assumed it was just because we had switched to typing from handwriting (sure, when I was in elementary school I wrote things, but from high school on, all my correspondence with other people and most school stuff was typed). I mean, if the only thing you see about him that seems "young" is his handwriting and drawing, that doesn't really mean anything. I'd be more concerned if he actually behaved like a small child or exhibited strange, childish behaviors. Drawing and handwriting is nothing. I knew a girl in art school who always drew like a child, even after years of studying drawing. Nothing was wrong with her, that was just her style. Likewise, I've known lawyers with awful, childish handwriting. Nothing wrong with them.

 

[Gs172003]

I'm American, despite the Ukrainian flag on my profile. And I think most of the people I grew up with...

Do they literally write like they are in the first grade? ( I'm not exaggerating). If so, good.

I hope it's just the way he is though he there is alot more to him that troubles me than just his writing. His writing is no big deal compared to the rest. But he's slowly improving.

He told me a couple weeks ago..."if I ever cared enoigh to take the time to think about my childhood I wouldn't be here"

That scares me.

 

[Casey_03]

Yeah, they do. I mean, I've actually seen some of my friends' writing and thought it was a child's writing. And these are very intelligent, accomplished people.

His writing is no big deal compared to the rest.

The main thing is that you're actually paying attention -- which means he's got a mother who cares enough, and is attentive enough, to help him through whatever he's got going on. That's hugely important. Your worrying is actually a good thing, even if it turns out that you never had anything to worry about in the first place. And honestly, if he is showing signs of damage from trauma, that is actually better than if he was NOT showing signs, because then that would mean it's all bottled up and ready to explode years later. So, i wouldn't worry too much about the handwriting, and as for the other stuff, I'm sure it's worrying, but in some ways it actually means he's normal, and having a normal reaction.