How Perpetrator's 'groom' Victims To Make Them Feel Like Its Their Fault

[grey eyes]

I have not seen it , but I will force myself, I confronted HIM ( by telephone ) he called me a liar , told me I was crazy and on drugs. None of which is/was true. But the important thing was that some where inside I had heard this before and when I broke down he laughed, I knew this was how he had made a small helpless child believe that I was wrong and no one would believe me. Its important for me as an adult to understand as much as my children believe in Santa , I believe in HIM .

 

[votedmostcheerful]

I believe you, Grey Eyes.

 

[grey eyes]

I believe you, Grey Eyes.

Thanks x

 

[freakofnurture]

when I broke down he laughed

The thing is, even if a child were to sexually approach an adult, the only appropriate reaction of the adult would be to tell the guardians of the child, as well as child services!

So even if a child had initiated contact, it would still be an absolute and total failure of the adult (and the symptom of a dangerous sexual pathology called 'pedophilia') to accept that contact. He'd betray the child, he'd betray the child's guardians and he'd break a law that's there for a damn good reason.

No matter what the adult says, in the abuse of a child - sexual, physical, psychological - it is always the adult who is responsible. It is always the adult who did something wrong. Children simply don't have the emotional and intellectual capacity to be responsible. Children Can Not Be Responsible for how an adult treats them. Period!!!

 

[MyStarryNight]

I really needed to read this post. Thanks.

 

[jimmy-joe]

The thing is, even if a child were to sexually approach an adult, the only appropriate reaction of the adult would be to tell the guardians of the child, as well as child services!

Paranoia makes me point out to be careful about how you approach the guardians, idk, just seems too much of a risk they are in on it. (assuming the kid didn't pick it up at school or etc)

 

[freakofnurture]

@Mir: If you're referring to my post: You're very welcome :)

@jimmy-joe: Yes, that is definitely a point one needs to consider! Thank you for bringing it up. Personally, I wouldn't know how to decide. Maybe it's be the safest option in general to talk to child services first? They should be able to tell you how it's best to proceed in an individual case.

 

[grey eyes]

A few months ago I was told that doctors and care services in England believed up until the 1970s that this kind of thing (parents and children having sexual contact) as something that happens and that it was normal. Anyone know if true ?

 

[Queen Boudica]

I can't believe that is true.

 

[grey eyes]

Ok,I found the old text which comes from a friend, it says

He was not entirely sure as to the widespread normalisation of the notion but, certainly, during his research he came across references to paedophile apologists in the psychiatric field who routinely presented theories that aimed to support their own twisted motivations. How widely this was accepted is difficult to ascertain at this point, but such opinion did appear in psychiatric literature. The gay rights movement was often used as a vehicle for it.

 

[Queen Boudica]

What has it got to do with gay rights?

 

[grey eyes]

I took it to mean that the notion that paedophilia was a sexual orientation in that as much as a person would say their sexual preference was the same gender a paedophile would argue that their preference was no different as an orientation. The North Americian Man Boy Love Association (Nambla) frequently was involved with latching on to the LGBT rights movement. One of the founders of the False memory syndrome foundation (FMSF).

A Ralph Nader , gave a pro paedophilia/incest intervie with Nambla fmsf is entirely discredited now in the scientific community as being suspect, yet they still been used in court cases to discredit witnesses accounts of spontaneous memory recall of abused memories.