Cooking / Baking Disasters

[Bilby]

it looks like a penis with 4 testicles

Can't say I saw that :laugh:

 

[Froggie]

Ohhh my gawd this thread is just tooo funny, really needed something like this today.

OK, my kids were teens when this happened and I was at home with my eldest son and his girlfriend. Being an eat healthy freak mom, I decided to try some health cookies. I bought a cook book for the occasion and chose 4 recipes. After each batch we tasted them .... :meh:, one was so bad that I ran to the trash can to spit it out. Then my son's GF did the same thing and told me that she was soooo relieved seeing me spit it out as she didn't know what to do so not to hurt my feelings. Well basically, we decided to go back to the old fashion not so healthy cookies, threw the cook book out alongside the 4 batches of cookies.

When the kids were younger, I had made a cake for desert, but I muffed it. The kids wanted to taste it as I never muffed up cakes. They said it was the best tasting cake they had eaten !!!! OK yes it did really taste good. But the bad part was that they went bragging to their friends at school that their mom makes the best tasting muffed up cakes :facepalm::O_o:

 

[amethist]

But what is a Christmas cake, I am curious.

Whitney Christmas cake is a rich fruit cake made with lots of dried fruit, spices and can be decorated.

 

[KP the nut]

it looks like a penis with 4 testicles

Can't say I saw that

But I bet you went back to look - I did :roflmao::hilarious:

But what is a Christmas cake,

I'm making mine this week. I'll post a pic. I will 'feed' it with brandy through November. Then I make almond paste (marzipan) and cover it with that. The a couple of weeks before Christmas I'll ice it with royal icing.

 

[piratelady]

So many people here hate Fruit cake. My Grandpa makes one that is a little less fruit and more spiced cake. I love it...even though everyone else thinks I'm crazy :)

I thought of another cooking incident. This one almost went awry but my Grandpa caught me first and saved the day. I was making this "low carb" bread with soy flour and egg whites. It called for cream of tarter to make it rise. I looked everywhere in the grocery store and couldn't find it (I'd never used it before), then I came across tarter sauce.

I was in my Grandparent's kitchen, had all my ingredients. I couldn't find the mixer so I thought I could beat the egg whites with the magic bullet (apparently that won't work). So I'm running the magic bullet for what seems like forever, when my Grandpa comes in. I tell him what I'm doing and he informs me you can't beat egg whits to stiff peaks with a magic bullet. He starts to walk out, and sees Tarter sauce on the counter. He looks at me and asks what it's for. I humbly reply, "The recipe called for cream of tarter, I couldn't find it anywhere and figured this is creamy and...tarter so I bought it" I don't think I've ever seen my Grandpa laugh so hard. Then he told me what it is and where it is in grocery store. Ahh...good times :D

 

[KP the nut]

This one was Hs Mum.

She did a large dinner for H and his brother, his wife and children. All went well until dessert. She had made a steamed spotted dick (For those outside England, before you ask - it is a suet pudding with dried fruit in it :p). She took it out of the steamer, turned it onto a plate and brought it to the table.

When it was dished up, we began to eat until my B-i-L asks where the dried fruit is - yes, she forgot to add it.

The joke became we had dick without the spots :roflmao:

 

[discarded]

Euhhhhh, (((KP))) it looks like a penis with 4 testicles :eek:

If you had a penis and 4 testicles that looked like that PTSD would be the least of your troubles.
I can't believe I just responded to that, not such a prude afterall.

 

[discarded]

Whitney Christmas cake is a rich fruit cake made with lots of dried fruit, spices and can be decorated.

Will be cooking mine soon ready for Dec 25, oh and the Christmas pudding too

 

[Whitneys story]

Aha! The one that we call Fruit Cake and no one likes. Standing joke in the US. No one has ever tasted it as they pass on to someone else. I used to make in my day but used no citrus fruit. I infused with brandy. The almond paste sounds wonderful. Yum Yum

 

[KP the nut]

The almond paste sounds wonderful.

That is the bit H likes the best. I make a double batch and make bars of it for him.

 

[CraftyCath]

The mix on the tray was a blobby baked mess

Steve thought that was for him KP until the penis/testicle thing came up! :roflmao: And yes, I did go back and have a look! :hilarious:

I don't remember having any disasters as such but I have a habit of cooking veg and either forgetting to put the water in and burning it or cooking it and forgetting to serve it! :eek:

When I was in Domestic Science (cooking, food technology) at school, one girl was such a bad cook. On one occasion we were making Swiss Roll and she forgot to add the eggs. She cooked it and when she came to roll it out it was solid! It just broke up into tiny bits, all crumbly and hard like cinder toffee! Such a shame.

 

[Bilby]

But I bet you went back to look - I did :roflmao::hilarious:

Guilty, your Honour ;)