I'm A Regular Member, This Needs To Be Anonymous Though.

[Obodi]

So I suffer from non-combat PTSD. There are a plethora of traumas in my past that I have never dealt with.
My significant other was aware that I had problems (emotional and mental) when we fist began courting. Though she had some mommy and daddy issues, it wasn't anything too serious.

My diagnosis of PTSD came after we wed. Lately, she has been claiming that she's depressed. Here's the problem. I know she is full of it. How, the pills (celexa) give her a f**k it all feeling, like Flexeril or Vicodin.

It's getting to the point where she's leveraged her job and gotten off easy instead of putting in work. I am constantly irritated now, it adds to the pressure and anxiety. She throws temper tantrums when she doesn't get her way. And I am just expected to grin and bear it.

I'm thinking if things don't change we may be headed for the big "D". Any thoughts? Anyone experienced the same?

 

[Wibuso]

Wow, you sound seriously short on sympathy. I think your anger needs therapy, couples therapy, to have the best chance of being resolved. Good luck with your relationship, I can only imagine it's very hard. I have PTSD and my husband is depressed with some anxiety. It is tough. I had a lot of anger to work through, and we know the PTSD makes the anger much worse.

 

[Kucagu]

How do you know she's faking depression? Because she has a f*** it attitude? Those pills can do that.

 

[Mezoc]

So I suffer from non-combat PTSD. There are a plethora of traumas in my past that I have never dealt with.
My significant other was aware that I had problems (emotional and mental) when we fist began courting. Though she had some mommy and daddy issues, it wasn't anything too serious.

Ok, let's get this straight - you have trauma you haven't dealt with and you told your wife before the two of you got married that you had trauma. She has mommy and daddy issues, and you are judging that your issue(s) are bigger and more important.

My diagnosis of PTSD came after we wed. Lately, she has been claiming that she's depressed. Here's the problem. I know she is full of it. How, the pills (celexa) give her a f**k it all feeling, like Flexeril or Vicodin.

Then you got diagnosed, then she got diagnosed. She is taking an anti-depressant to help deal with her diagnosis. You're still not getting treatment (or you're doing little in that respect), while the medication your wife takes makes her less diligent in putting your needs and wants before hers and (at the very least) you're still judging her.

It's getting to the point where she's leveraged her job and gotten off easy instead of putting in work.

I'm not certain what you mean by "she's leveraged her job" - Nor am I certain what you mean by "putting in work" - is that referring to her not going to a job to work or she's not putting in "the work" to make you feel happy? I'll assume both: she's on a leave of absence in order to take care of herself, the household income has been reduced, and she's doing what you want that would make you feel she's useful and that would make you happy.

I am constantly irritated now, it adds to the pressure and anxiety. She throws temper tantrums when she doesn't get her way. And I am just expected to grin and bear it.

You feel emotionally irritated because of what she's doing, or not doing, which doesn't conform to how you think she should behave. That causes pressure and anxiety in you, and you think she should change . . . hmmmm, the irritation, anxiety and pressure are yours. Right? And she gets angry, and you don't deal let her have her anger - you grin and bear it because you think that's what you have to do, for her. And you don't like doing that, so she should change. Hmmmmm . . .

I'm thinking if things don't change we may be headed for the big "D".

If she doesn't change and be and do what you think she should, then you're thinking maybe you should just divorce her! That's a mighty powerful thought - kind of childish too. Maybe you never really loved her in the first place and shouldn't have married her, since it sounds like the reason you married her was for you to use her.

I venture, maybe along with the mommy and daddy issues, your wife is depressed from living with someone who has unreasonable expectations on her, i.e. you.

Put your man pants on. Deal with your trauma. Deal with your emotions and learn how to communicate better, then maybe you'll get your needs and wants met more often while at the same time enable you to assist someone else get theirs met. Now, that could be truly fulfilling. Maybe even fun.

 

[Ehe]

Your wife has a genuine illness that needs support just as much as yours does.

My husband is the sufferer and I have depression and anxiety issues. This morning my anxiety levels are quite high, so I told my husband, and guess what, he stepped up to the mark to support me today.

In a relationship its what you do, work together for the best of each other. So come on stand up and be the man your supposed to be, even if you don have PTSD.

 

[Idud]

even if you don have PTSD.

The above from the post above should read "even if you do have PTSD"

 

[Jicu]

Are you seeing a therapist?

 

[Tarecal]

It sounds like you are frustrated by more than just her depression. However, if you feelmlike her behavior has significantly changed maybe the medication is making her depression worse? SSRI medications such as Celexa are typically the first line of medications that are prescribed for depression. Most people will respond favorably to them. However, some people cannot tolerate them. SSRIs and SRNIs are a bust for me. Some SSRIs can worsen a person's symptoms and/or just leave them feeling flat with no discernible mood changes (e.g. not apply, not sad, just a nothingness). I don't know if this is the case for your wife and judging by your tone it seems that you don't have much patience for her or her behavior. Maybe your personalities just lash and your PTSD decreases your ability to tolerate the idiosyncrasies you were once able to overlook?

 

[Sesowa]

Sorry for the typos in the above post. I meant to say, "not happy, not sad" but I must have been typing too fast and my tablet auto-corrected to, "not apply, not sad."

 

[Jenike]

I am guessing the OP ran for the hills because all of the posts are spot on. Until you can walk in someone else's shoes, which you never will, don't judge! Man up and have a real non-judgmental conversation and actually listen. Or, you can just throw the towel in and get the big "D". Your loss if you go that route.

 

[Obodi]

I am guessing the OP ran for the hills because all of the posts are spot on... Your loss if you go that route.

Nope I did not throw in the towel. I gave her an ultimatum. Whether we work out of get divorced remains to be seen. I haven't been on here for a few days as I have been transitioning into a new position at work and the hours and mental requirements are to say the least exhausting.

 

[Obodi]

Are you seeing a therapist?

Yes, a therapist and a psychiatrist. I also have them working in tandem to allow for a more thorough and effective treatment.