What Is It About Us?

[Tswevnz]

There is nothing wrong with you, ptsd is a normal human response. Keep in mind that the word 'trauma' encompasses a lot, if we're going by the definition of an event that is life threatening, or sexual violence. This ranges from being an adult in a bad car crash, to being a child and being sexually abused by a care giver. It just makes sense, in that case, that some traumas are easier to 'let go' than others. Having violence perpetrated on you by someone who is supposed to care for you is going to shatter your trust in the world, among other things. Being involved in some kind of accident, such as a natural disaster or car crash, while scary and devastating, would naturally be easier to come to terms with, as in these cases nobody is actively trying to hurt you. I'm not trying to discount survivors of these kinds of events, as I understand how horrific they can be, but psychologically I don't believe they affect people as much as abuse does.

Im sorry - but have you experienced different types of traumas in order to say / judge something like that? Its as INSULTING as someone believing PTSD is some kinda of "drama" mood that can be "choosen" to get out of.
Nomatter the reason why anybody develops PTSD , it is traumatic, emotional & scary. You should never judge , ask why / how or grade different types of experiences ! Everyone is different and the reason for being on this forum is NOT to be judged!

"naturally be easier to come to terms with, as in these cases nobody is actively trying to hurt you"

I live in Christchurch new zealand.
I have lived through and experienced thousands of earthquakes. I have on 3 different shakes ( that was over 6 on the richter scale) lost friends, my home, animals, cars , 2x jobs you name it.
Each shake i wonder - will i die, is everybody I know safe? Will my animals be safe, will i have a job or has this buildning seen enough and will come down too, will there be gas, food tomorrow, can i pay bills , survive?. Will i have water, toilet for months, will the insurance company run me over, will i lose absolutely everything i worked for my entire life ...,,

I can assure you that "coming" to terms with natural disasters when you know at any second, anytime, ANYDAY .....you can loose everything you own and love.

My so called trust in the world is pretty shattered i can assure you. I dont have "one" perpetrator , i literary have had the earth destroyed under my feet. Who are you to say its easy to get over?

 

[digger]

Being involved in some kind of accident, such as a natural disaster or car crash, while scary and devastating, would naturally be easier to come to terms with

Wrong. There are many many people who develop PTSD from single adult traumas. The original poster didn't even say what her PTSD stems from in this post. How do you think someone who has developed PTSD from a single trauma will feel reading your statement?

 

[Tswevnz]

Wrong. There are many many people who develop PTSD from single adult traumas. The original poster didn't even say what her PTSD stems from in this post. How do you think someone who has developed PTSD from a single trauma will feel reading your statement?

I have survived earthquakes and a very, VERY horrific near death white river rafting accident. I swam for my life in 120 cubic-metre per second flooded, angry winter river.

I can tell you after reading that post you quoted, I feel PISSED OFF!!!

 

[ms spock]

Hey guys this is someone else's thread maybe start another thread about this. It is hurtful. You are all needed here. Let us all kind of stick together. I can see why you are hurt and upset.

 

[digger]

It is hurtful.

I agree. That's why I was making the point. The original poster didn't say what her PTSD comes from. I think comparing traumas and how they should or shouldn't affect people is unhelpful to everybody. Lotusstar's comment is reinforcing the idea that people shouldn't get PTSD from some types of trauma. Or that it is more acceptable to develop PTSD from some types of trauma than from others. The original poster is upset about developing PTSD when some people don't. I don't think the thread has be taken off topic.

 

[Kas_Can_Fly]

Genetics, personality and proneness to anxiety/depression come into play as do any other disorders or physical conditions/disabilities you might have.

All of this results in change to your response such as being able to accept the trauma as it is and move on or having severe and debilitating PTSD or any other outcome.

 

[Kas_Can_Fly]

I don't think harm was meant by Lotusstar's post. I think she meant that some people are able to come to terms with natural disaster and it not cause PTSD, equally however some are able to come to terms with rape and/or domestic violence. Not that the trauma is less, but that proportionately more people are able to accept the trauma and live there lives healthily in spite of it.

Just as some people are more prone to certain trauma's, there are traumas that more adversely affect others in terms of quantity, for example approximately 1 in 6 police persons is prone to PTSD, compared to 1 in 3 military veterans and 1 in 2 abused children. I'm not saying that the trauma is more or less, just that more or less people get PTSD from those traumas.

We are all individual and our PTSD is individual too. But what ever causes the PTSD is unique to us. Even if two people had identical trauma, under identical circumstances one might get PTSD and the other not - does that mean that one had it worse than the other? No, or at least no at the point of the trauma, the additional suffering of the disorder is unfortunate but no one is at fault for it.

I think that some genuinely accept that it was a freak or rare occurance for them and when the disaster ends and/or safety is returned to them they can move on - this might be easier for them if they didn't live in an area prone to (for example) hurricanes/flooding/earthquakes. Equally some people who have been a victim of domestic violence or rape can accept upon leaving the relationship that other people won't be the same as their abuser and no longer feel threatened. Just as I'm sure that some military veterans can accept that the war happened in another country and that when they're home they are no longer a part of that war and that they are now safe or that the war is over. I also think that some people would be vulnerable to both types of trauma, in some way, whereas some people may only be prone to PTSD from one type of trauma though there is little way of knowing. So Lotusstar genuinely might not get PTSD from a natural disaster because of the way she sees it or understands it, not because it was less traumatic. None of this is a personal attack or invalidating anyone's trauma or anyone's integrity as an individual.

 

[JarHed]

I don't think that 30% of people who experience a trauma get PTSD. I think that number is quiet low. It's probably more like 70% but perhaps only 30% allow themselves to face the reality of it and even try to do something about it.

Even if you've had a wonderful childhood, supportive parents and friends and are 'well adjusted' there is no way to know if you will or won't experience a trauma and have PTSD after it.

Personally, I would say the best thing is if you're experiencing what you believe is PTSD, get some help for it. Don't let others try and make you feel like you should just ' snap out of it' or 'get over it'. Those are the things that hurt and prevent people from getting the help they need.

I will, though, have to disagree with Kas when it comes to military vets, as I am one. No one that experiences combat is ever the same after. Some have serious PTSD and other less severe. None are the same after. Because of the nature of humans to be different than each other and resilient that we can move on from it. I know WW2 vets that still get chocked up when talking about their experiences even after all these years. The same, I think, is true for other traumas that cause us to have PTSD. I just think that it's a human reaction to a traumatic situation. Just my opinions and observations here. I guess what I'm saying is that no one should feel bad about having PTSD, it's a human thing, but something we can do something about as well.

As always, very thoughtful and interesting threads here.

JarHed

 

[Justmehere]

I talked with a trauma therapist about this very issue. He treats people from all over the world at an intensive treatment program. He said that this is a question that is not really fully answered in research yet. He also added that the environment in which the trauma occurs seems to play a huge role. He said, "the more in validating the environment, the more likely the person will have more PTSD." He used the example that if a child is molested, reaches out for help, and gets it and gets support - they tend to recover. If the same child is molested and is already living in an environment that invalidates them, they are less likely to reach out for help and if they do they are more likely to be disbelieved and to internalize the messages they are very bad and the world is not safe and so on...

That was just his opinion on it. It's a tough question to grapple with.

 

[Kas_Can_Fly]

@JarHed Yes, I was being incredibly broad, I didn't mean offense. I do agree with you and wasn't sure about using that Military Vets as an example because I don't believe anyone comes back from war unchanged. Having said that, the same could probably be said about most if not all trauma, I equally doubt any abused child would not be changed by their abuse. Whether this change could be labelled as PTSD though is not always the case, some people develop entirely different disorders that are psychotic in nature rather than anxiety or depression based as an example, or personality disorders.

 

[Sally sue]

Thank you all for your thoughtful and supportive comments...I think email can be difficult sometimes since it's hard to identify others intensions or to clarify immediately. It feels so supportive here, I feel so blessed to have found this community...I so needed it!!

 

[Justmehere]

I have survived a natural disaster, I have been next door to a mass shooting, I have been in an event where I was in safer neighborhood but had to hide from a gunman loose next door, I have watched someone die in front of me, I have been a victim of crime by a stranger, and I have been a victim of abuse by caregiver as a child, I have been a victim of bullying and whistleblower retaliation. All of these events had different impacts on me, but no one event was easier to deal with than others. I also have wrestled with the reality that some people who survived the same natural disaster *seemed* to be impacted much less, but myself and others were impacted greatly. For me, it's probably a matter of cumulative traumatic stress. For others, it could be how much they lost, what they saw, the degrees to which they had been trapped during the trauma, and the level of outside supports...

I think it is human nature to compare traumas, and natural to think the grass is greener elsewhere. Really, all trauma is called trauma because all of it is terrible. I think that is one thing we can agree on.