Body Memories - Ugh, Becoming Wet?

[Labunu]

I'm posting this as anonymous for obvious reasons...... I can't believe I am actually posting this BUT I can't seem to find any information on it no matter how much I google.

I deal with body memories quite frequently. It's as if the sexual abuse is happening all over again, and I can feel everything, and it's sometimes associated with pain as well. The most embarrassing part is usually...I become "wet" as part of the body memory. It feels absolutely shameful, horrible, and disgusting.

I'm assuming it's my body's way of "preparing", acting as a defense mechanism? Either way, I'm just wondering if anyone else has experienced this or I'm completely alone...I'll just pull the paper bag over my head now as I hide in embarrassment :bag:

 

[Wijuw]

wet" as part of the body memory

Me too. Difficult to post, but very interested to learn how many of us there are.

 

[Epo]

You're not alone. Female bodies don't only produce lubricant when they are aroused; our bodies do it when they know they are going to be penetrated. Actual arousal is a bunch of other things. Anyway, I've experienced this as well. Just try and remember that the actual function of the wetness is to prevent tears and other injuries, and to "seal off" the urethra to guard against UTIs. It's the same way our eyes tear up when something gets in them - the body is trying to flush out the eyelash, or bit of dirt, or whatever. Just the body doing what it does.

 

[Ekoji]

I dont experience body memories but when I was being raped I would very wet at the start. Contrary to popular belief vaginal lubrication doesnt actually indicate a woman is aroused! Its simply a responce to virginal stimulation for the purpose of preventing tissue damage. I think you are right about it being your bodies way preparing during a flashback. Try not to give yourself a hard time about it. Sounds like you have enough to deal with already.

 

[Uwub]

Contrary to popular belief vaginal lubrication doesnt actually indicate a woman is aroused

What is your reference source for this?

 

[Igite]

Personal experience

 

[Rutep]

"Female genital response is an automatic reflex that is elicited by sexual stimuli and produces vaginal lubrication, even if the woman does not subjectively feel sexually aroused...Female genital response entails increased genital vasocongestion, necessary for the production of vaginal lubrication, and can, in turn, reduce discomfort and the possibility of injury during vaginal penetration."

Source [DLMURL]http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/love-sex-and-babies/201105/why-do-women-get-physically-aroused-and-not-even-know-it[/DLMURL]

 

[Pibup]

Glad I'm not alone

*hugs* xxz

 

[Zuni]

elicited by sexual stimuli

Ok. But. If this is true then why does thoughts of violence work as sexual stimuli and a loving partner during loving sex not work as sexual stimuli.

 

[Kelikav]

Ok. But. If this is true then why does thoughts of violence work as sexual stimuli and a loving partner during loving sex not work as sexual stimuli.

Interesting question.,. I don't find that the nature of the stimuli makes a difference for me, my body responds in the same way to all types physical and / or mental stimuli whether i'm happy about it or not. A possible answer to your question could be that when the body is faced with a perceived threat (thoughts of violence) it is more likely to react in order to protect itself. But as with all things in life, everyone is different. I'm interested in hearing others opinions on this.
Also I do think that there is a connection between arousal and vaginal lubrication for some people but it is not a prerequisite.

 

[Gurib]

why does thoughts of violence work as sexual stimuli and a loving partner during loving sex not work as sexual stimuli.

Because your body was taught this association long before you were prepared emotionally to make choices to associate sex with loving feelings. Instead your body reacts to 'forcible' sex. I have this large piece to work through myself but have other large issues to deal with first. When it was touched upon by a therapist I went from being 'totally normal' sexually to being totally turned off of sex. Once the memory came up, changes occurred in me immediately. I feel like if you could work on the shame part many pieces could fall together for you.

 

[Labunu]

Thank you all for your responses, it's a huge weight lifted off my shoulders to see I'm not alone in this....but still SO difficult to discuss! I've noticed it also happens when I see a scene in a movie or tv show similar to my abuse experience. Ugh ugh ugh, anyone else?