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Deleted member 28812
My sufferer is in trouble at work. Basically there is a person who shows good initiative, poor judgement and my hubby was blamed for this and his ability to lead questioned. There is nothing hubby can do because this person just does not listen to him.
Hubby was in a bad place but all he did this weekend was complain and nag me for things like having a bag of trash standing in front of the. I wanted to bring it out in a few minutes when I found the time. Hubby blamed me for never doing what I am asked to. It is not me but the guy at his work who is like this. If I am asked to do something I always do it. I pointed that out, hubby barked at me to do it now- ASAP - .давай, давай (give me, give me, meaning: quick, quick or let's go, let's go). Making a давай gesture. He struggled with taking out the trash and it is still difficult for him.
There is nothing in the world I possibly hate more than being told давай, давай because it is just so patronizing. If there is anything in this world that rubs me the wrong way...
On any other day I would have yelled at him but this day I was able to realize that he was pretty low and I just said "No. I won't be talked like this. If you want me to bring out the trash you must ask me in a friendly and polite way." - "If you just would take it out and spend no time discussing it already would have been done" - "I have got all the time in the world and I won't take it out. I won't be told to be давай. It is not my fault this guy at work is annoying you". He told me he was sorry. Wow. I brought out the trash. I am happy that we solved this conflict like this.
Later, in the night, my husand jumped out of the bed. With a bang I was wide awake but realized he was possibly unable to sleep and did not bother to ask him why he was doing this. He did not come back to bed but I heard hom noisily doing things. Thanks to what you guys shared on this page I was able to see that he must have felt unable to sleep in bed and I thought "Poor hubby" instead of "WTF is he doing again?!?!"
It's both a accomplishment. I noticed that some things he does are just not about me.
Hubby was in a bad place but all he did this weekend was complain and nag me for things like having a bag of trash standing in front of the. I wanted to bring it out in a few minutes when I found the time. Hubby blamed me for never doing what I am asked to. It is not me but the guy at his work who is like this. If I am asked to do something I always do it. I pointed that out, hubby barked at me to do it now- ASAP - .давай, давай (give me, give me, meaning: quick, quick or let's go, let's go). Making a давай gesture. He struggled with taking out the trash and it is still difficult for him.
There is nothing in the world I possibly hate more than being told давай, давай because it is just so patronizing. If there is anything in this world that rubs me the wrong way...
On any other day I would have yelled at him but this day I was able to realize that he was pretty low and I just said "No. I won't be talked like this. If you want me to bring out the trash you must ask me in a friendly and polite way." - "If you just would take it out and spend no time discussing it already would have been done" - "I have got all the time in the world and I won't take it out. I won't be told to be давай. It is not my fault this guy at work is annoying you". He told me he was sorry. Wow. I brought out the trash. I am happy that we solved this conflict like this.
Later, in the night, my husand jumped out of the bed. With a bang I was wide awake but realized he was possibly unable to sleep and did not bother to ask him why he was doing this. He did not come back to bed but I heard hom noisily doing things. Thanks to what you guys shared on this page I was able to see that he must have felt unable to sleep in bed and I thought "Poor hubby" instead of "WTF is he doing again?!?!"
It's both a accomplishment. I noticed that some things he does are just not about me.
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