I Cry For My Generation More Than Anything.

[iwannadeletethis]

OK. I make decisions on what to listen to based on whether or not it makes sense and has a foundatio...

Ok!! Thanks for clarifying!! I do appreciate it. I've had issues with people trying to "save" me over and over again and I like to make sure that things are safe and secure.

The media.. The political lies.. How women tare each other apart because of societal standards.. How I'm not aloud to be assertive in 2015.. It's basically listing the things wrong with society. I don't have a "tribe" because of how scared women really are and how scared I'm not. So the lack of community really leads me to question what's worth living for? I have a drive to live.. And I have no idea where it stems from. It tares me apart quite a bit. Though I don't want to cheapen the word, I feel like "raped" is an accurate description of what society looks like to me. My mother used to rape me between the ages of 5-7. I know the weird wrong f*cked up feeling that comes with it. And that's my descriptive word.

 

[Anarchy]

I feel like a quick glimpse in the history books shows that humanity as a whole is continually improving. :hug: It is an upswing graph with many ups and downs, but the trend is upwards. I dont know what your generation is, but I personally dont feel particulary raped. I believe one tends to notice it. There is no other time I would rather be alive.

That would figure, there is a school of history that gets called "Whig".
It assumes a teliological onwards and upwards course. That's what they look for, so it's little wonder if that is the bias they impose on events.

If you search for " contra Whig theory of history " you'll get an interesting critique of what the Whig theory inadvertently implies.

 

[Mallaky]

That would figure, there is a school of history that gets called "Whig"...

Except Whig "theory" is a political perspective, while I encouraged a scientistic. Or put another way: Whig theory is about proving a prejudiced belief, while the optimistic skeptic's view is about disproving the theory of declining humanity. One is a logical approach, the other isnt.

 

[iwannadeletethis]

That would figure, there is a school of history that gets called "Whig".
It assumes a teliological onwar...

Huh! Fun facts!!

 

[joeylittle]

I don't have a "tribe" because of how scared women really are and how scared I'm not. So the lack of community really leads me to question what's worth living for?

This makes sense to me - you haven't found your people, in any sort of way. And you want to find something bigger than yourself to be connecting with, seems like. Gosh, I really do wish you could get into peace corps, or Americorps, or habitat for humanity. Something that would let you connect with other like-minded people. I'm certainly not one to say that the world is an awesome place, but there are lots of pockets of incredibly wonderful people and organizations, maybe even more than all the big pools of bad stuff. My sister spent a lot of time doing volunteer/habitat-type house-building and community building stuff when she was trying to figure out what she wanted out of life, and the world. Lots of the stuff you wrote here reminds me of her.

But the point is, there really are places where it's not all about the kinds of interpersonal dynamics you describe. Try and not give up on finding one for yourself, even though it's really hard. Also, it's something sometimes people spend a lifetime trying to figure out, where they want to be. But the trying doesn't have to be all bad.

 

[Flossy]

I've thought further on the original subject of this thread and also the aspect of someone feeling irritated that someone else may be trying to 'save' them.

My niece with BPD has the same objections to anyone trying to help her.

Others have said that the forum is for support. I think it is for support while going through the process of learning.

Bottom line = I don't think using this forum will be successful in healing trauma and managing PTSD unless each individual uses it to 'learn'. For me this means asking questions, sharing a problem, getting options for solutions, considering them carefully, choosing one or more and then putting that into practise. Doing it, taking action.

I dont think the forum is a place to be 'supported". I think it is a place to get support while we learn.

If we only take the support and do not learn by listening and changing our behaviour, we will not change our lives or our depression or PTSD.

We are not here to be heard as the end result. The primary goal if you really want to heal and manage symptoms is to learn and change.

@Skitzii This thread and your reaction to some trying to help you, along with other threads where the same members have tried to help you with your abusive partner reveals that you seek support in your decisions. Then object to help that requires you to change your usual behaviours.

You have chosen to stay in an abusive relationship until you see if he gets 'mean' again.

This is the same mindset that OJ Simpson's wife had.

You also responded to help in a way that showed you consider it an affront or intrusive for someone to respond in an urgent manner.

For me, I've had enough now. I can see that you do not want to learn or change, you want to be heard. I don't want to be a part of that. It is exhausting and futile.

It does suck the life out of others.

Have you considered that your friends tried to save you in the past because your thinking is out of order and your life is out of control.

There may be something else, such as a personality issue, apart from PTSD and depression that you may want to seek testing for.

Again, bottom line, if you dont use the forum as a means to learn and change, it is futile for you and for anyone who tries to help you.

I know you won't like me saying these things. That's OK. I dont mean you harm, but I mean for you to recognise that everyone else on here is severely traumatised. Consider them please. I'm done.

 

[iwannadeletethis]

This makes sense to me - you haven't found your people, in any sort of way. And you want to find som...

It would be nice to make the trying more of an adventure <3 not so much a struggle.

 

[iwannadeletethis]

I've thought further on the original subject of this thread and also the aspect of someone feeling irrita...

I'm only here because I'd be homeless if I left. If I don't give him a shot I'll just end up walking out. And be homeless. This is me surviving. And @joeylittle and I resolved all that. I'm taking advice to learn from but making sure it's not getting shoved down my throat. I'm aloud to ask to be treated fairly.

 

[iwannadeletethis]

I've thought further on the original subject of this thread and also the aspect of someone feeling irrita...

@Flossy im not angry. Are you angry? I'm not sure you understand what I'm trying to say. I can be very blunt. And I'll look into BPD.

 

[Flossy]

@Skitzii I'm not angry. I'm tired.

 

[iwannadeletethis]

@Skitzii I'm not angry. I'm tired.

I'm not sure which kind of tired you're referring to, but I hope you get some rest <3

 

[Anarchy]

Except Whig "theory" is a political perspective, while I encouraged a scientistic. Or put another way: Whig theory is about proving a prejudiced belief, while the optimistic skeptic's view is about disproving the theory of declining humanity. One is a logical approach, the other isnt.

How is assuming any trend, logical?