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my old T said something very similar to me. I am now married and have a healthy, consensual and sexual relationship. Having said that, I think that there are still situations where I wouldn't be able to consent. Not with my partner. I think part of navigating my past was learning to recognize...

That sounds awful. How are you doing now?

Yes, cheated is a good word. It's a sad thing, when parents can't provide the love and care they should. I've come to learn that sometimes they can't acknowledge the abuse others did because it would mean they need to deal with all the ramifications. They are incapable of taking on the hurt...

I am done trying to talk to this particular manager. I have actually brought this up. All she will do is ask me what I've done to fix the situation. She will then come up with some lame brain idea to improve efficiency that has nothing to do with what's actually been discussed. Ok I have done...

So, the department I work at right now is pretty dysfunctional. For many reasons, not just the ones I am going to mention, I am trying to get out. Currently, I am a bit trapped. I feeling a lot of resentment regarding one particular coworker. I feel it's out of porportion and I don't get why I...

Just wanted to say I can relate. Dealing with something similar.

Oof that is a lot and really hard. I think adapt is a process and there is probably bits of adaption that have already happened but it's easy to miss when so much is overwhelming. I am not good at taking my own advice here, but I think the focus shouldn't be on work but on rest and recovery...

I agree with the others. Anger towards abusers and enablers is a reasonable part of the process of healing. I am curious why your therapist thinks blame isn't helpful? How do they feel it's impacting your healing process? Sometimes talking through those things with your T can lead to really...

That's such an odd way your therapist handled that. Sounds like a bad fit and good that you recognize that early in the process.

I am glad that you are out of that situation. And very sorry you had to deal with that. How are you doing?

Welcome to the forum. It sounds like you have some things to figure out. What can help, is not focusing on the memories or even the lack of memories but exploring how you feel about them. Do they trouble you? if so, why? Where does the embarrassment stem from, and things like that.

I thought I'd update. We had a bit of an email exchange. Got caught up on each others' lives in a general sort of way. She is unavailable though. I am clear I don't want to go back to my last T. Logically, I'm struggling and a T probably would be a good idea. Right now though. I just don't know...

I am so good at hiding my feelings it is scary. My best T even told me once that I didn't give her any cues as to how I was doing so I had to use my words or she wouldn't know when things were bad. I agree with @Friday that people have to earn the right to really see what I am feeling. That...

Yes, I have been thinking about that. It's part of why I mentioned that it's still early in the the grief process. I know that is skewing my perceptions. Definitely worth considering Well, she answered. Some parts inside already feel relieved? It sounds like T may not be available anyway...

I was in therapy for a lot of years. The therapist I did the most work with was really great for me for a lot of years. She was always a bit flakey but it was offset by how good she was and how generous she was. She is the only therapist my parts (I have DID) would come out for. She then had a...

I am also like that. I have DID and also dyslexia/other neuro-divergent stuff that makes me lose track of time and scramble what I am saying. I also feel the compulsion to correct myself though. I once told a therapist my time from was "it just happened"; "recently"; and "a long time ago".

You were a young child. Many children who have not been sexually abused engage in sexual play and exploration with themselves and others. What you did could fall into the range of normal. At worst, you were acting out the abuse as Friday mentions. If that was the case, the fault rests on your...

Oof, that sounds really difficult. How to do you plan to move forward from this? How do you care for yourself?

my first therapist was so so, but one thing he used to say is that life isn't a race. There aren't true finish lines where you are supposed to have things done. Life happens and things don't get done on time. I get the embarrassment, I certainly feel that at times. It's so easy to see the flaws...

you ever walk on a beach or open fields or something. You can walk and walk and walk and looking forward, it doesn't seem like you've made any progress. When you look back though, you can see that you have. You are dealing with a lot. You are moving forward. It's ok to stall on occasion. The...

I have run out of time to reply right now, but intend to come back to this later. I do feel there can be differences in how it impacts you, if it's your father. I know it impacted me greatly.

I am glad that the food is resolved for the short term. That is a start. It also sounds like you came to a good realization about food being a trigger. I hope you can keep things moving forward. I am sorry things are such a slog

I am glad your last session was helpful. I don't have a lot of thoughts but it's a very interesting topic to me. I think, for me, getting at the core of what pulls me towards a certain charming person is key. My paternal grandfather was charming, but he was so openly sexist, racist and abusive...

So, I work in vet medicine and have for years. The last year I've worked in oncology and have seen way too many pets at the end of their life. I've seen so many "normal" people not notice things. Why? Because life is full of stuff and it's easy to miss stuff. Because they didn't want to see what...

This is very understandable. It can be a bit of a trap though. I'll give an example. I had a friend sexually assault me. I can remember all the details. I could decide that if I hadn't acted in a certain way, that could have been interpreted as flirting it wouldn't have happened. My brain just...