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Hi Telly, Normal people haven't got the shipping container to drag around like we have. I said to myself, look there those 2 people over there, they are normal. I want to be be like them, normal. But I still don't know how. There's a distance, actually from before the wheel of our ship got...

I guess music is the best way to block out the sensitivity or white noise. Downloaded rain sounds for the night. Real rain is better of course. Also good for the garden and farmers. hasn't rained for 7 weeks. Hopefully Sunday. Probably a few drops again.

I relate to the above, except for the aliens. Was able to do this in the recent past. Now I'm in the real world and I don't like it at all. Now it's some kind of video that rewinds back and forth with sound. With other videos through it some times and snap shots. Also dark bits where the videos...

What it says in the title. Has this something to do with the cptsd or not? Do others here have this too? For example humming traffic in the distance, a fan somewhere outside. I play music than. But than somehow the background noise seems to bite itself into my head. Am I listening for danger...

Dissociation is the experience with detaching from reality. What Foxxiemoxxie describes looks like an autism trait.

In my understanding what you were doing was, avoiding to come in contact with yourself. The danger zone. So you had to get away from your inner self, by doing all sorts of things that weren't needed just then. Try a sorter period, like a minute reading or 5 minutes and extent later. Maybe that...

I have since a few weeks decided to cut the family ties with those 2 named above. My family is now; 1 sister, and 2 brothers and me. Not 4 brothers and 1 sister. Told my T, she said I was brave to do so. Actually there weren't much ties. Hardly no contact at all. But for me they are no longer...

I was disappointed when I was "finnished" with the last round of trauma T. Imaginary T. I had to go deeper than I ever had been, so I believed my symptoms would be gone. But that's not quite true. I am still in therapy. How do you experience a flashback now after you had EMDR? Do you feel less...

I'm so sorry for your son and you.

Going outside is difficult for me too. I have the feeling that other people somehow see there is something wrong with me. That I am a special person. They seem to look through me. It's quite busy here with dog walkers in the park and they nearly all say hello. At the moment I can't handle this...

I'm talking about psychiatrists, not about their clients. For your information.

Hi, I have cptsd too. I cried when I got the diagnose. Finally I got the recognition. Take all the help you're offered, but remember,; you are in control.

I admire you Calmdown. You are such a strong person to be able to get through this by yourself. You are a real asset to this forum.

I wonder if you have a numb feeling most of the time. Or that you have mastered to hide from your feelings. Medication like anti depressants are there to help you to stop feeling sad, anxiety, etc. I've been on both for short periods. You're not suppose to take these medications for long times...

I know this is a post from last year, but I am now at this stage. It's very tricky indeed. I tried restoring the contact on my terms and that actually worked. But to be honest what were they for me? I don't know them. We differ 7 years. There are 9 years between my oldest brother, who I didn't...

Yesterday I told my oldest brother what happened to me. His reaction was so sweet and kind. I was scared to tell him. He wrote: you never had the life you should have had. They destroyed your life. he understand exactly what is wrong to me. Not even my mother understood this. My oldest brother...

Suppose to write rotten fish letter to abusers for next T session. I'm getting scared if myself. It's worse than the song below.

I haven't been on here for a while. There are 2 sites in me. I found notes from 20 years ago. I supposedly had come to a state of forgiveness. This is gone and am now again in a state of unfinished business. How come that I believed I worked true the trauma and felt I could take on the world...

Hi, I don't know what your history is, but something in real life might have made you frightened, confused and perhaps also hypervigilant. Dreaming can be very strange. They are a combination of your unconscious mind, things that happened yesterday or longer ago, how you see the future and more...

Hi I'm not so long here either. Perhaps you sleep a lot because you have released steam from your brain. Talking through what was hidden deep inside, I mean. I'm doing Exposure T. I cried, was incredible angry, I shouted and had body shocks. All at home while listening to the recording I made in...

What terrible to read that after you've been in therapy for a year, feel in such a dark and lonely place. I understand that you can't carry your heavy load any longer. Please know that you are not alone and that there is someone who sees your suffering. You can't see Him He wants you to call out...

Hi Sjmel, welcome to the club you don't want to be a member of. If people can't see you have a disability, there is nothing wrong with you, they think. The world is full of egoists.

So sorry to read your story. The teenage years are so precious. Please seek professional help. Remember it wasn't your fault, you didn't deserve what happened. The longer you wait with getting help, the worse you'll get. You might get periods that you function as a "normal" person, but like us...

Yes I am doing exposure therapy with an professional. I never saw it like this, because of the small age difference and emotional connection..

I don't know if this question is in the right topic. I have been SA ed by 2 of my brothers, that is clear to me. What is not clear to me if this was the case with a 3rd and younger brother. We differ 1 and a half year in age. With this brother I had quarrels at the dinner table nearly every day...