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Been working on myself a lot lately. Going to therapy, waking up earlier, getting in with my psychiatrist, and trying to take care of my physical health. I've also started reconnecting with a lot of positive influences in my life and trying to connect more with family. I feel as though it's...

Working on getting out of my hometown after all this time! Im very excited and counting down the days until I get out of here! Three cups of coffee and some forced optimism and I'm feeling great about today!

thank you luckily I will be moving on from here in a semester so I am not stuck here.

Hate trying to find Literally. People are the worst. I have responsibilities to my boss but If I didn't I think I'd already be in the orzarks. So tired of people. I've felt like crying or screaming all day.

Yeah, I'm in college and it just sucks. I wish I could just leave but my job is related to the school so I have to be here in person I just ugh. its the worst I broke up with my girlfriend at the time and it ended with them sorta picking sides I guess. She's younger then me so she needs the...

Losing my friends and my support group at school is so f*cking awkward. I feel like I can't breathe they didn't even look at me I just.. I cant breathe it's too much I don't want to be here. I wish I could drop out. I wish I never made friends in the first place. this sucks I wish I just...

i dont know im not good with people they're all still alive but I might as well be dead to them I cant communicate and I just no matter how much I try I f*ck everything up

I lost all of my friends and my girlfriend in the course of a few hours today. I don't...i don't think I can stand losing everyone again

I'm sure a lot of it. I've been trying to maintain positivity but there's been so much going on that I just get so overwhelmed. I relied on my service dog so much, so when he started having reactivity issues and showed signs that he hated working I knew it was time for him to become a pet. I'm...

Yeah I've sorta put out a volunteer thing for my other friends it was just a lot for today I guess

I hate this feeling. I just got snapped at by one of my friends at school. I was doing some work which involves putting up posters and taking pictures of people within our college program (for the posters) I had asked them several times which person on the poster they'd like to be and two days...

Oh! i didn't mean by yall I just meant by me like I would get overwhelmed and delete it lol thank you for understanding I'm sorry if it seems like a crisis thing it was more of a rant

I don't know what this is. I'm just... high and exhausted and no one listens or cares anymore. I feel like I've been suicidal for so long that no one would even blink if I actually did it. I can't talk about any of this. Not anymore. T tries to help but I feel like I'm past helping at this...

Idk need to vent Had to retire my service dog and suddenly life sucks again I want to drop out of school I can barely make it to any of my classes and the thought of people makes me want to vomit I literally am sitting in class having a panic attack and flashbacks and I can't breathe and...

Throughout working with my therapist (almost three years) I feel as though we have created a very important and close relationship. I've been struggling lately. Struggling. I want to rely on her, tell her what's been going on but I'm afraid... I know it's her job to help me but I just feel...

Its 1am and I feel wired. Flashbacks are moments away and I feel myself sinking into that normal routine of wide awake and on the verge of panic. My service dog is still awake so it helps. It's just so frustrating knowing that I have classes tomorrow but I'm still not going to get any sleep...

the meeting went super well it was just super stressful I think the beginning was really rough for my sd to get used to but he's adjusted super well and we haven't had any problems in months! I spoke about how he's been reconditioned and trained since the incidents and they were really nice...

Today I have a meeting with my college president due to a couple of instances of my service dog barking and "acting aggressive" I know that this is just his job to make sure everyone is safe but it's so f*cking stressful knowing that my service dog is fine. He just has moments of excitement and...

thank you i really appreciate hearing this.

We all have a common discord server we use. This is the second time I've left it. I just want to leave them all alone. there's no sense in trying to drag them down with me as my mental health just continues to deteriorate.

I keep cutting off my friends. Something about me is just wrong. I don't know why good people want to hang out with me. so I'm just gonna disappear from their lives. I don't think any of them understand how this is gonna make their lives easier. I'm so tired of feeling like this. I wish I never...

My T and I ended up pausing our EMDR sessions until further notice. I was being flooded and until I get back on my meds and am able to self-regulate it's probably not the best option right now.

I hope I get to that point with it. Today was the first day we tried it in therapy and it brought up so much and I feel awful. I felt fine at first but tonight has been absolutely awful with flashbacks, panic attacks and the like.

emdr therapy f*cking hurts. it hurts so much and I f*cking hate it.

I'm lucky that it's only been one or two students in the hall. No one has really brought it up to me and it hasn't been too much of an issue but I just try to avoid people who are scared of him or even overly excited that there's a dog at the college.