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Exactly. Sometimes I feel what I went through never really happened but i bet it was because from a young age, I started to learn how to act as if everything was normal because i was so embarassed about where I came from and wanted to pretend everything was so normal at home and everything was Ok.

Sometimes I feel like I am lying when I am telling my story. Sometimes I can't believe it happened. But it did. Sometimes I wonder if it is related to the fact that my dad called me a liar almost everyday of my life growing up from the time I was a little girl. Sometimes I feel guilty for things...

The other thing I want to add, is I believe we were wiser than people gave us credit for when we were young, and instead they shut us up and that changed our paradigm of how we viewed the world around us. We clung to that innocent knowing of what's right and wrong and in between but the abusers...

Hopefully our suffering does have healing with it. I guess there's gotta be some sort of reason for it even if it doesn't make sense? I dunno. I find doing the best we can to be gets tiring sometimes and just being helps for us to ride through it.

wwe Thank you @blackemerald1. I realize you were simply trying to convey we cannot rely on other people to make us happy and you are right. Although we do need supportive people in our lives. Having some kind of a support system is so important for us to recover from traumas and such. Of...

My mom was raised in the cult and left home as well as the cult, only to fall in love with my dad who learned about the cult through mom, and decided to join the cult around the same time I was born, so I was born into it. While in the cult, I learned to survive my abusive childhood by being a...

In trying to heal from my initial abuse, I practiced as much self care as I could and didn't beat myself up when I couldn't do as much as others when my PSD symptoms were real bad. I also educated myself about PTSD, and anything to do with health, found a therapist I trusted, slept when I needed...

I'm sorry you have been through so much. It's not right and it's not fair. I can somewhat relate because growing up I was both physically and emotionally abused and it has actually hurt me sexually and it sucks! It has caused me shame and feeling embarassed and scared that I am somehow very...

Thank you

I was born into a high demand group also know as a cult and even though it sucked growing up in it because life was so restrictive in it and we were'nt allowed to be friends with anyone outside the religion. Anyways, I eventually fell for the BS and went all in volunteering, etc. It's...

What helps motivate someone when they are totally down and out or when life throws them something awful? What really helps someone to be inspired once again and have hope? Any replies welcomed. Thanx And to clarify. I'm talking about what drives someone to love life again after they've perhaps...

We are all beautiful people who are going through so much hurt. Why? I don't know but I think it's unfair. We all deserve beautiful lives that are completely fullfilled emotionally, physically, sexually and spiritually. I believe there are ways we can heal and truly reconnect with ourselves so...

"Not denying yourself peace", can totally relate to that. I am doing that to myself currently and wondering how I got that way. Ugghh. It sucks

Thank you @freebird . I didn'd have a chance to respond earlier cuz I had to work today, and I haven't been feeling well but thank you for responding. Your words are beautiful, deep and true. I will try to apply them to the best of my ability. We try to be "strong" sometimes whatever that means...

Thank you @Freida! "Denied safe passage into my own mind." That's for sure

Thanx. i hope this works for me because I have too many traumas and cannot deal with anymore

Ok. So you are living your life to the best of your ability despite obstacles and even enjoying the simple pleasures of life even despite abuse or maybe a different trauma. Then suddenly you find yourself turning your thoughts against yourself and engaging in self-destructive behaviors you never...

Thank you. I will get there somehow.

Thank you for this. I will use your suggestion

I feel like i have lost myself and my intuition when i left the cult. I don't know why

Thank you for sharing. i don't mind at all. I like hearing both sides. I may believe in a God again. Who knows. I am trying to tell myself the god i cursed at and rejected was the god created by the cult. Growing up, I truly believed tere was a God protecting me somehow. But now, if there is a...

Thanx for this. It is so true. Maybe I'm not letting go of self judgement because I'm scared. I know too many things I wish I didn't know. And as for God and faith, it's so wrong to create something that is capable of life and love but then allow it to endure things it wasn't meant to endure.

I am trying to breath right now. I know there are still so many good people out there but from my experience the last few years, hasn't felt that way. and I want solutions. I want to fix everything and I have such high expectations. I realise i need to somehow readjust this but it is too hard...

Yeah. I don't get it. What has happened to humanity?! Am I missing something?

I was hurt by a LOT of people when I started to leave the cult and my "friends" just watched me fall and didn't do anything to help me but gossip. Then people I encountered in "the world" (anyone outside the cult) such as ppl I reached out to or reconnecting with old classmates and such hurt me...