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Wishing you strength and peace.

Everyone has beauty inside. I hope this doesn't sound weird or patronising, but there is a special beauty in people who have experienced brokeness - it makes them so much more real in this world of fake things we live in.

You give me hope!

Dear Taylor30313, I hope it went as well as possible for you today. My husband is 36years of age and is about to carry on with his testimony in his charge against an uncle who did the same to him as a young boy.

Thank you, thank you everyone for your gentle, kind, insightful replies. I myself have never experienced this rock-bottom state of just wanting to end it all. So it is so alien to me, and yet, I have had my own share of suffering so I can relate to the pain and apparent hopelessness of it all...

I suppose I am looking for a "crystal ball" here. But, I struggle with this issue. My husband has so many unresolved issues from 36 years of dysfunctional living. I have mentioned before: his family life was grotesque: pedophile uncle who sexually groomed and abused him until his teens, his...

This little one is going to love you with his whole being! Anju is a lovely name. Most cats have a way of bringing a sense of calm into a place. They can be so peaceful and when they feel loved, they return that love a thousand fold.:):)

You are not worthless and defect, Lithocardium. The world you grew up in was defect. Where were those whom you could have turned to for protection as a 10 year old child. Where was the caregiver to look out for you? You were the sexual prey to this psychologically damaged young boy and he...

You can do it, dear Miss_Understood! That road may be long, but it is a journey that will be worthwhile!

Perhaps she was projecting her own fears onto you, dear Notsowild. Tagging you with her fears to get rid of them? It sounds like it was all about her own issues, and nothing really so much to do with you per se. It is hurtful and confusing nevertheless, as you guys are meant to be in a...

Would he be amenable to therapy? Cognitive Behavioural, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Dialectical Behavioural Therapy come to mind here. It is good to understand how thoughts, feelings and behaviours are linked. And how to break the cycle of reacting impulsively on misperceptions and the...

Dear Sierra Lee, this must be an awfully heavy burden to bear. Life takes us to terrible places at times. I hope you find someone trained to help you deal with this.

Do you mind if I post some of Herbert Groenemeyer's "Mensch" lyric? Yes,novmberDark, he is a good example of what is deep and heartfelt in German culture: teil mit mir deinen Frieden, share with me your peace wenn auch nur geborgt , even if only borrowed ich will nicht deine Liebe, I don't...

Dear Miss_Understood. You deserve help, no matter what. Talking about the past trauma is hard, but to get it all out is the only healthy way forward. Otherwise it follows you around no matter where you go. You can do it! You can face the past trauma, and find a better life. Let the next 28...

Hi Ayesha, I'm glad that you are deriving something positive out of the history classes. Germany does have a history of deep thinking philosophy and literature over the ages, and it is true that the language captures a concept well. We did learn to speak it from early childhood, but not as...

Thank you to All, I value all your advice. Will try not to overthink the thing, follow my instincts and still be supportive, yet not disempowering.

hhhmmmmm.......very Zen advice. I see your point, thanks.

Excellently done dear Bell. I could cringe at some of the bedside manner of people in the medical profession! Write a textbook about what not to do and say - and some of them go and do just those things!

I would appreciate any insight and advice please. My husband (suffering from Complex PTSD as a result of horrific childhood abuse; Bipolar Mood Disorder and / or Borderline Personality Disorder) and I have had a really rough 9 months of marriage. Our friendship and feelings for each other are...

To be sensitive and for one's feelings to run deeply is not an indication of "stupidity" :hug: Writing about it and talking about it to those who can get you on this topic, both seem like a good start! For me, I didn't have this burden of guilt about my past family history, but I had a...

Ayesha, it is not your burden of guilt to have to carry around. The fact that you feel so deeply about it, just shows what an empathic and caring person you are. I hope you find a way to release this millstone that is weighing you down. You did not ask to be born into a certain ethnic group /...

Dear Ayesha How many ways there are for others to try to wound us! I did find your story rather interesting, because my siblings and I are first generation offspring of German immigrants to South Africa. And here we had hardly any of that awful accusatory stuff about being "Nazi" etc. I...

Dear WendyA, please know that your heartfelt cry of pain in your message is being heard by others. It is so very hard when you feel that you are finished and given all you can to fight the pain. Your life can become worth living again. Your friend is a part of that, and other people you have...

Thank you Rainy_daze! The "rescuer" thing for me stems from wanting to please all the time. I guess the covert message I was getting as a child was that I needed to be a good little girl, I needed to do what I was told, but I also needed to be very vigilant as to what was happening in our...

Can this be something like Conversion Disorder, perhaps? I am trying to familiarise myself with it, as my husband (sufferer of C-PTSD and mood disorder and suspected Borderline Personality Disorder) had been labelled epileptic all his life from early childhood. Yet even the best medication...