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I Don't know... I don't know what... I can't...usually I'm better than this... this is so much anxiety it feels like my world is breaking. Like I can't be present if my life depends on it and it might but my body is tingly and nauseous and I can't breathe. I may it die if I postpone all until...

I am terribly anxious, like can't cope with truth anxious and also awake at night when I desperately need help anxious. I have to maaaybe choose to stay where I am 3 more months and that is brutal. Literally I can't deal living the way I'm living right now. I can't keep tolerating all I have...

Me right now.

I've felt like this before, I'm sure, but I'm trying to do better. Like I am dreading something this week and suddenly I'm obsessing for real. My world becomes tiny, my concentration goes out and doing 3 tiny work task takes me all day because thinking about my life currently gives me a stomach...

Things have been hard for a long time. I keep trying but it's exhausting when you put a lot of effort to just keep above water but yet know that if you don't, you drown. Things have been hard for a while. I'm trying to keep going. I no longer feel completely done and helpless like I did last...

@Survivor3 Because I haven't earned enough income in months and I keep regularly falling behind on like 5 different bills and debts at the same time. I had this period last year of really bad anxiety relapse that lead to no incoms for months and I got in so much debt from regular bills and rent...

@Survivor3 with you on that, I have dental issues too. Can't pay for them for few months more so I'm purposefully not worrying about it because there are more urgent stuff. As said as that sounds. I'm worried by the time I get my finances in order I'll get sued. Also that I'm so angry at...

My ballet studio.

Books that make you cry when you can really really use that.

Never ever ever again remember his face, or anything else about that night.

Writing fanfiction. Nothing like being extremely DRAMATIC in a fictional story, to get all bad emotions out of you and allow you to sync in a different world altogether. In a real book you have to be careful with how realistic you come out of. Fanfiction is just for fun and you can let all your...

You recheck you have locked the door way too many times at night, and you still don't have a clear recall if it was locked the last time you checked, so you have to check again. Because you can't risk a mistake.

@arfie Envy away, I'm doing the same right back lol 😆. Personally my life needs a lot of practical changes that need my attention- so really, excess energy would be super welcomes right about now. Today this feeling reached peak, and now I gave up eating mildly healthy cooked food and being...

Not eventually/with as long as needed but more intentionally? I'm stuck and I'm just digging myself deeper. I was on an upswing for a bit I think and now it's bad for a while. I need to help myself. The longer this goes on the more I abandon even self care activities that help mildly-journaling...

That really feels like I wrote it right now. Sorry you're feeling the same way.

The reality being really bad still can't snap you into action if you are in freeze mode. Because the way you feel and what you remember is so much more vivid than anything else. Your sense of time getting so fractured that intense life situations keep creating new ripples of mini traumas that...

And I got stuck. I'll be brutally honest I got so STUCK, all of December especially. My students were on break, and my clients and my already behind budget fell apart. And I spend days so depressed I only did 3 repeating things that gave me some reprieve from feeling like I couldn't breathe...

As someone who enjoys post apocalyptic fiction, I think I totally understand that.

I am not very hopeful right now, but I need to be to find a path forward.

For us on here we often go to anxiety or depression or something else, so I think every small thing that helps is that much more important. What helped you today, or recently? (Coping skill, gift, a book, coping tool etc.)? What made a difference?

Scared out of my mind. Dissociating.

On paper: Three Body Problem, Liu Cixin Crime and Punishment- Fyodor Dostoyevsky Audio app with my phone plan: Me before you -Jojo Moyes I like to switch genres... and also medium depending if I'm at home or on the bus/running errands

Subscription I was gifted in March for 1 year CBT based journaling app... I forgot about it but now seems like the best time to start using it again.

I can't spend a dime for food that isn't what I just have at home leftover, I have to work (apply for work) and I still might be in huge trouble for some bills and I'm too depressed to be festive much... Any tips on what to do? Or maybe how to set my thoughts so the holiday season doesn't make...

1. When your job prospects crash with no change in sight, and you have no savings...yeah, that's the thought, my brain literally can't compute 2. It's hard to be in holiday mood if you aren't going to make enough to pay your minimums but all your clients are taking 2 week holiday vacations 3...