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    What’s the “benefit” of repeatedly re-enacting challenging relationship dynamics?

    I say trust your instincts, if it feels true to you, probably is. Everybody has opinions, including therapists. Some of my most productive therapy sessions have started with, this part is off base, but here is where I am at with it... Sounds to me you believe your prior relationships with...
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    What’s the “benefit” of repeatedly re-enacting challenging relationship dynamics?

    Sometimes the way we frame the question sets the limit on the answer. I am late to the conversation and I have read enough to get the gist of the conversation. Here is my take: it is not always that we get a benefit per se. Sometimes it is that being exposed to repeat boundary violations can...
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    What do body memories feel like?

    My body memories are usually triggered by touch in the here and now. Rape survivor. My partner touches my necl, all of a sudden I am back there. My mind wants to disappear. I feel total body terror. That touch triggered a memory from another time. I was 17, so I remember in a troubling...
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    Getting Fit After Long Term Depression? Tips?

    Congrats sounds like you have a good starting base. Walking and stretching and pleasurable movement are all good to start. Dancing can be good too. Start with reasonable goals so you don't get discouraged. Remember you are starting where you are and moving forward gently. 5/7 days is a realistic...
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    Need Coping Techniques For Panic Attacks

    i am having panic attacks again for the first time in years. I woke up the day after Christmas dry heaving in fear. I forgot how awful these are. Can you guys remind me of some coping skills for panic attacks?
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    The Anp

    Merry Christmas or happy holidays or some shit. Whatever dills your pickle. I like at least 6. Steady every night. Keeps me regular. Got a smoke? What to put in , what to keep out? Hairs and strings. Nobody strums your toon. I told my therapist I have to watch out for lynchings in public...
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    Sexual Assault Humiliation & Degradation Part Of My Sexual Abuse Seems Worse Than The Actual Assault?

    i get what you mean about being devestated by the flat mate. During traumatic experience the mind grasps at straws looking for salvation. I remember being terrified when one of my rapists left because he was not a sadist and somehow him being there meant safety... it makes no sense now, but at...
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    Sexual Assault Humiliation & Degradation Part Of My Sexual Abuse Seems Worse Than The Actual Assault?

    Having been raped by several people I got the gamut a few were in it for the raping. They I can understand. They do not terrify me today. The two who were in it for the torture... I can't even think of them without breaking down. It is an entire different level of trauma. I understand how you...
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    Sexual Assault Humiliation & Degradation Part Of My Sexual Abuse Seems Worse Than The Actual Assault?

    I was kidnaped raped and tortured by some sociopaths and their friends. The part that really broke my brain is the knowledge that truly inhuman people exists. Trying to understand the mind of someone who enjoys torture is a lost cause, it hurts you as an empathetic person. In the moment of...
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    The Anp

    f*ck you. f*ck you ten times over. I have never meant "duck you"... except when you swung at my head. Duck you ten times over... A lot of the time I pretend to feel normal. Connected. Reciprocal. In truth, I have limited continuity. I only pretend the dots make sense when I connect them. Sure...
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    To My Friends Living With Ptsd

    PTSD is awful. I have been facing mine head on for the last 4 years. It's hard. The more you look at it, your symptoms get worse. At least initially. I think of it a burping a pickle jar. You have to vent it in little bursts and then take recovery time. Whatever the trauma, if it caused PTSD it...
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    I want to quit

    Radiation is hard sorry you are going through it. Here if you need a friend who has been there.
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    News Do Americans Wonder Why The World Makes Fun Of Them? Answer Here!

    What many Americans and foreigners fail to realize about the propensity for gun violence in the states; it has a tremendous amount to do with race issues and issues of social inequality. We are not that great of a melting pot, we have large numbers of diverse people living side by side and...
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    The Anp

    Practicing feeling the overwhelming emotions that are going to drown me, burping the pickle jar of trauma. Today is fear, sadness, grief, worthlessness, anxiety? (not sure if that's an emotion). This feeling of emotions is new territory for me. My ex used to call me a robot when I would shut...
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    Other Coping After The Us Election.

    To me lean into fear means resisting the urge to run from what scares you. My PTSD program is to run away. Leaning into the fear for me is getting comfortable with being scared.
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    Other Coping After The Us Election.

    @joeylittle thank you for your thoughtful reply. I was not able to articulate exactly how and why the idea that accepting sexual assault and the attitudes that support it as "nothing new" bothered me so. You expressed that well. The scary and disturbing part for me is that it is nothing new...
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    Other Coping After The Us Election.

    I've been offline since the election. It's been too hard. I am a sexual assault survivor. Even though I know people we not voting for sexual predation when they voted for Trump, they were voting to ignore it. It feels completely invalidating. It brings up a lot of the feelings I had when I was...
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    The Pain Of Positive Attention?

    It takes me ongoing practice to take a compliment. I often have felt like a fraud. With a lot of therapy to change negative cognition and learn to accept (well earned) praise I have found I can. Hope this changes for you too.
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    The Anp

    Read a great book. The Body Keeps the Score by Dr Bessel Vander Kolk. Learned two useful things that helped my EMDR processing. 1.you can process emotions without words. 2.where speaking fails writing sometimes works. Where do you feel this in your body? Tightening in throat and chest. Can't...
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    5 Things I'm Thinking Today

    1. I like getting older 2. I am ready to let go of the past 3. Independence looks good on me 4. Whenever I get caught up on somebody else I need to remember to look at my reflection 5. It's ok to let go of relationships that no longer serve you. No guilt needed
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    What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

    Proud that I am getting better at having words and feelings in the same place at the same time.
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    What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

    Disgust when I remember which I've been letting myself do in small doses again Numbness it's hard for me not just to go numb when I remember Peaceful in my own space/skin from time to time Thankful I am alive. Loving of my life today.
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    Relationship My Boyfriend Won't Open Up To Me

    One of the effects of trauma is that story is separate from the person. Think of it as less about you and more about him. Maybe he can't fully tell the story yet to himself or you. It has taken me17 years and it is still fleshing itself out. There is huge value in having another person willing...
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    What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

    Orville and Wilbur Wright are the Wright Brothers credited with inventing the first plane and taking the first flight
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