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Search results

  1. Klanala

    Old habits die hard, when will the self sabotage end?

    Please try to set goals . Even small ones. Break them down into tasks and sub tasks. When I was I back in my own apt in july 2014 recovering from a craniotomy and bacterial meningitis of my brain I did this. Now I am engaged have a dog a cat am a sars cov 2 survivor. My fiance is a trauma...
  2. Klanala

    How am I supposed to do this?

    I began stuttering around age 3 and had speech therapy/ treatment from a psychologist. The advice given to my parents- stop the perfectionism. They did not. I am now 59 a retired RN and trauma survivor. Your post resonates with me. My father and mother now must accept my no contact rule and me...
  3. Klanala

    Is breaking ties okay?

    I just ended my relationship with my parents by asking to make my brother their 100% beneficiary on all bank accounts etc. I give up on trying to change anybody but me. My family - what is left can come on ad nauseam scapegoating me and anyone else. The river denial runs long. If they fail I...
  4. Klanala

    What do you wish you'd been taught about money as a kid?

    Pay god so to speak first. I guess that turned out in reality that healthcare came second.
  5. Klanala

    certain types of phone calls triggers overwhelming rage

    Yes I had this problem and still sometimes do. I have had to become careful about what I allow in my life including phone calls. Our world is complex and phone trees are real. The human brain can only tolerate so much stress. It may not be all you but other people expecting you to except 100...
  6. Klanala

    The uncertainty of relationships

    I like what you said about people coming and going- friends coming and going. In life's infinite wisdom they served their purpose for that time in our life journey.
  7. Klanala

    Codependency

    I was required to read Codependent No More as part of my trauma recovery. Later on my own I learned about how trauma codependency and addiction are connected more through online research. I saw this play out in the last church I attended. The church was giving a member financial support then a...
  8. Klanala

    Sars cov 2

    Thank you black emerald 1 I agree. I hope you are finding the same or similar. This site has helped me. Ever forward.
  9. Klanala

    Sars cov 2

    I recovered from my sars cov 2 diagnosis/ infection. So did my fiance. He got sick too. Off work for 2 weeks. I will not return to caregiving. We are focusing on the online second income and other issues. I am not responsible for the world but realize everything is interconnected. Sars cov 2 to...
  10. Klanala

    Relationship SO has dissociated and the part of her that is doing the driving right now has her abusive ex staying in our house. What do I do???

    At this point I have to ask a tough question. Does anyone want a better life? Who is getting secondary gain? Does someone have a vested interest in allowing this abuse/ victimization to continue? I am very sorry you and your SO are in this situation. I have had a past history of...
  11. Klanala

    Terrified to the point of physical illness over COVID test

    Face your fears and get tested. Yes I had symptoms and tested positive for sars cov 2 on july 8. I am fine now except angry at the FLA governor asking us survivors to be tested for antibodies so we can donate plasma to help others. I am a retired RN. I will always do what my doctors say . Not...
  12. Klanala

    Relationship SO has dissociated and the part of her that is doing the driving right now has her abusive ex staying in our house. What do I do???

    PTSD symptoms occur from domestic violence. I advise you to set clear boundaries for yourself. Safe ones. You need professional help as well. Make sure you have a safe place to stay. If minor children or pets are in harm's way call the police. An expert order or order of protection may be needed.
  13. Klanala

    Even professionals struggle to help

    AJ - I am a retired RN. I once did psychiatric nursing. My fiancee is I think positive too for sars cov 2 right now. He has had more symptoms than me. I am mounting some immune response- My symptoms are gone. I take melatonin for sleep. I have a recumbent exercise bike in our apt for exercise...
  14. Klanala

    Even professionals struggle to help

    Well actually I am not chickening. I am positive for sars cov 2. The daughter of man from second caregiving job told me she was positive for covid on day 11. She was deceptive. I had a seizure risk from a craniotomy in 5/14. Became seizure free july 2019. I resigned from this job too. I had mild...
  15. Klanala

    Even professionals struggle to help

    I just caught up on all the posts AJ. I am very sorry for your losses. Take care of you. Our physical and mental health are interconnected. Can I suggest a physical exam as well?
  16. Klanala

    Even professionals struggle to help

    How can we help? Are you able to define any negative core beliefs or cognitive distortions? You say are not sleeping. Definitely your neurotransmitters are imbalanced just from that. Multiple life stressors do the same as well.
  17. Klanala

    Sufferer Saying hello-- cPTSD from a diverse abuse history

    Welcome. Glad you are here. Ever forward to recovery. You are the CEO of your life.
  18. Klanala

    Self talk about unasked for advice offline

    In my opinion they are perhaps questioning your reality. I have mine established. If a govt agency has violated mine it needs to be dealt with. Refurbished vs. new computer is a personal choice- a person's reality dictated by finances. We can be influenced by others even manipulated. I have to...
  19. Klanala

    What do you do when your brain feels overloaded?

    I think it is called cognitive overload. It has been an individual learning process for recovering from a craniotomy stopping chronic sinusitis becoming seizure free. I had to stop facebook develop strong boundaries which is an ongoing process know when I need to say no. Learn cognitive...
  20. Klanala

    What helps you sleep?

    I listen to a meditation called transforming fear every night. I take melatonin 10mg. My physicians know and it does not interact with anything else. A hot bath helps. Plus if I may add my fiancee
  21. Klanala

    Dealing with mental health and the call to activism

    In the course of my recovery from bacterial meningitis of my brain health care providers therapists nurses emphasized safety and self- care first. As I grew to understand trauma more and codependency and narcissism and making a few mistakes getting involved with a few churches and individuals...
  22. Klanala

    Find this so sad

    Thank you. To keep my relationship with another trauma survivor I need to remember this. We are still learning about each other.
  23. Klanala

    Stuck in Anger about no closure and injustice

    There is karma. I believe she knows on some level what she did and you having no contact is holding her accountable. Abusers usually have poor health. My father is accountable- his daughter is a legacy and his father's legacy. My grandfather died from epilepsy. I am after much work seizure free...
  24. Klanala

    I am not responsible for the world- my partner believes he is

    Ok- update. My partner is a trauma survivor like me. The incident I posted resulted from failure to communicate. We resolved it. He came close to death like me in his past. It is a very stressful time for everyone. He had ACE like me too.
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