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I am doing better now, decentering love and relationships right now, and focusing on healing. It feels good :) I still am getting bad flashbacks but they have pointed out to me my triggers and I've found when I don't fight them and just let them happen is when I am able to move on from them more...

This feels good, maybe I should keep up with it again.

I feel so stupid like a f*cking cliche at times.

Right now I'm thinking I don't even want to have sex anymore. All the pleasure from it is gone.

I still struggle to see that worth sometimes, I'll admit it. I met someone just like him, just f*cking like him, and I felt it from the start. He had the same sleazy energy. I immediately recognized it. We were together for a little while but we did not end up dating for long enough for anything...

I am so sad for the version of myself who started this, I couldn't see then how much I was worth

I feel like I've been running from what I went through. I was so young (I still am, as it's only been 3 years), and I just wanted to forget about it and enjoy the new, fun transitions I was going through at college. I feel like I really did for some time there, I just didn't think or talk about...

dang all I wanted to do was rant did not think it would cause this much of a problem :/

Hi all :) I'm sure some of you have heard about FKA Twig’s domestic abuse lawsuit against Shia Lebeouf. I felt quite triggered by it and just wanted to say how I was feeling on here because I don't really have anyone to talk to. Even though I don’t know her I’m really proud and happy for her...

Awwww thank you same to you! @ms spock 💜💜🎄🥳

Been a few months since I posted on here. Since I'm back in the place where it all happened it only seems appropriate lol. (I actually laughed at that in my head lol) laughing about it seems to be helpful. I told my brothers what happened. They were so understanding and supportive. It made me...

My recollection of the abuse that happened is so broken I can't tell if I'm having a real flashback or if I'm just filling in the blanks. I blacked out almost every time I was with him. I remember sitting on the bed after he would leave, I would just stare into space and replay what had just...

@Friday @Movingforward10 Thank you for your replies, it helps more than you know. Unfortunately, as much as I wish I could I am not able to leave the house in the ways @Friday suggested. My mother is the one who rents it and her lease goes for another year. I am begging her not to renew it...

Hi all :) its been a while since I last came on here. I remember how much it helped me knowing I wasnt alone so I decided to post again I moved away from the house in which my abuse happened for college but im back again because school is on break and im feeling all sorts of things right now...

@Powder Thank you for the advice. Now that you mention the correlation between PTSD and certain foods , it makes a lot of sense. Im going to try your suggestion and see what foods affect me. im so glad someone can understand where I am coming from regarding Rx and Dx. After reading your...

I was badly triggered today after cleaning out my closet. I found an item that I had used around the time I was with my ex and forgot about. I stood there and it felt like the room shifted and I was back under him again, being assaulted. It was like I could physically feel it all over again. I...

Thanks for replying :) I always find that I resonate with your responses a lot. I think that describes the dynamic of most my friendships perfectly. I am usually the one giving advice but do not receive it. Sometimes I believe my struggles are too "big" for my friends to handle because while...

I dont really have anyone to talk to. Not only about my mental health but just in general. I don’t really have friends anymore. So yeah im coming on here to vent because I don’t have anywhere else to. One of my closet friends, someone who I would call my twinflame ghosted me at the begining of...

Bipolar disorder. It has affected both my mother and father’s side of the family.

I also have been having trouble in regards to food and eating. I starve myself for days at a time but sometimes I just don't feel the need to eat or that the hunger I feel isn't really hunger and I just suppress it. And then also sometimes I will feel hungry and go to eat but the thought of food...

I'm pretty sure I have an undiagnosed mental illness but I don't know what it is and I am scared to face it. Earlier this year I tried to overdose and was baker acted and put into the hospital. They put me on Cymbalta and a mix of other medication (can't remember the names but one of them were...

I am going to take control of my trauma. I finally spoke with my therapist and it felt soooo good to tell someone what he did to me and tell them how much its been affecting me. She already has given me things to do to help take that control back. She told me part of the reason I feel the way I...

Hey @EveHarrington Im so sorry to hear what you went through. I myself recently left an abusive relationship this year. I completely understand everything you are feeling and just know you are not alone. I know its hard not to feel ashamed for not leaving sooner. I felt the same way but then I...

Thank you for that, I needed to hear it. I'm going to try and focus on myself before I take on a whole another person.

Hiii @Movingforward10 Thank you for that piece of advice from your T. I often find myself feeling ashamed of myself for getting myself into such a terrible situation. But I didn't "get myself into" it, I could not have known how abusive he would be. And he shouldn't be abusive in the first...