5 Things I'm Thinking Today

[Friday]

I am cut off from the grandkids now thanks to my daughter

I've completely cut my son off from one set of his grandparents. For good reason. BUT something I've always been very aware of is that is only a decision I can make while he is young. The older he gets, the less say & the less influence I have over whom he chooses to spend time with, until I have none at all. If he wants to pursue a relationship with them when he's older? There is nothing I can do to stop that.

I know that doesn't take away the pain of missing out on their childhoods, nor the fear of not knowing what the future brings, but hopefully -even if she doesn't reverse her decision in the meantime, and she may- being cut off now, doesn't mean you'll never have them in your life, nor be a part of theirs. :) Worst case scenario is waiting will change things. And the love you bear them? Isn't something anyone else can ever take away from you. They'll always be in your heart. As painful as that is, sometimes, it's also pura vida / pure life.

 

[ladee]

Thinking I have just been thru what @gizmo is experiencing, glad it's over for me... no contact.... calmer and happier.
Thinking I am here for gizmo, because I understand.
Appreciate @Friday taking care of her son with no contact.... can't make everyone happy.
Missing a beautiful day because I am in pain.
Glad I am retired and do not have to work tomorrow..

 

[Recovery4Me]

1. Learning many things from other members thus opening my perspectives -so grateful for their time & efforts.
2. MyPTSD Board has helped me to develop many skill sets (although I am still practicing:clown:)
3. The feel of the board now (to me) is much more community like (in the moment) than confrontational. Thank you monitors.
4. It is odd how things ebb and flow during change.
5. My disassociation is still in mid gear but I am not in full fledged panic in this moment.:tup:

 

[Tornadic Thoughts]

If my body lets me get through one more chore, I'll be forever grateful.

If not, it'll be there when I get to it.

People who use their turn signals......I thank you.

People who drive without texting and talking on their phones.....I thank you even more.

Mindful or mind full.....hmmmmm.........

 

[Ronin]

1. I'd totally like to be supportive to Giz & everyone, I'm just afraid I don't have the words & feelings to proper emote about the whole topic (kids & loss of relations) so here's <words of support / care> and leaving it there.
2. Thinking of who else owes me money. Because bloody damn it I need it.
3. What Would Buddy Do... he'd probably rest and eat more. Fine. So I'm resting.
4. Heroic tasks in unsupplied shitholes: Getting a cherry coke. Right. Because they have dope every corner but can't handle a cherry coke.
5. Let's not think more of that, I'd be back to I don't-give-a-f*ck-someone-bomb-it Done. And my body wouldn't thank me for the rage.

 

[intothelight]

1. Have to double check my submission and won't find peace until I confirm I faxed it to the right number.
2. So sick of the rain and will have to find an alternative to hit exercise goals.
3. New month, new start, rinse and repeat.
4. I have the ability, just need to find the perseverance to succeed.
5. Find a way to make someone else's day.

 

[Deleted member 28740]

Contact the Humane Society about job opening (good fit actually) given 24 hours to submit Cover letter and Res. Vomit, shower, try again… got it in. (aaahhhh well almost, sent draft cover letter). Not much difference, just spell, grammar. SIGH. Deadline and could not find the saved copy, then did find but was on reread not the final. F'ME.

Response was would notify on Sunday 23rd. Request for CL and res was the 25th. Love head f*cks.

Contact them? Obviously they received the CL and Res. but the Sunday by 6 if wanted to interview, but date was wrong. What now?

Land lord handy man who has been building a small dog run show up whenever, and a month later some posts and not done. Hate confrontation. WTF.

Bad gut up 3x a night, deep depression and zero money with bills due. Family sick of burden.

 

[Tinyflame]

@Changeling @gizmo @Lionheart777 @C j @Ronin @Anrish @ladee @Recovery4Me @intothelight and all :hug::hug::hug:

I heard it said God is close to everyone, but especially those in despair. That was very comforting.

And not to run away.

Horrible time of anniversaries. Holding on, through, by (very tired) fingertips.

 

[Deleted member 29920]

Yes, horrible time ((((@Junebug)))) love to you

 

[Deleted member 12723]

Thank you precious @Junebug many hugs to you especially right now.

Thank you @Friday for the comforting truth for me to hang onto and thank you @ladee I just may take you up on your offer!

 

[ladee]

Hoping @gizmo takes me up on my offer... here for you giz..
Thinking as I went to the store at midnight last night for smokes, that I ran over a snake in my own driveway, and am now totally freaked out when I found it this morning....:eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek:
Going to get dressed and go see what Nature is up to today.
Agreeing with @Recovery4Me how much nicer and calmer the site is now... and the ignore button helps !!

 

[Recovery4Me]

@ladee I would have been freaked out too! All that good meat to be smoke cooked...wasted.:rolleyes::clown:
Glad you are OK.