Advice Requested-was This A Ptsd Moment Or Post-training?

[Recovery4Me]

I am not sure exactly which forum to open this as I am not sure if I dissociated or not...but I think so. It might fit in assault but I am not so worried about that part. (Weird I am at times, eh?)

I was going to just let this sit in my journal and then I decided to face the music and post to ask for advice on whether this was a PTSD flashback moment or possible post training.

Today, a male coworker (half my age) that has played mind games and intimidation tactics, threw his fist towards my body today as I was waiting on food to come up for a resident and my back was leaning against a wall. Ducking or stepping aside was not an option as in the corner and his fist was coming mid range. I literally caught his fist in a counter move 1 foot from my stomach with my bottom flesh of my open-palm intentionally with thrust up, fingers positioned, then cupped his fist and stopped him. His impact was extremely solid and his eyes flapped open as he was stunned.

I casually mentioned he must be practicing and that he was getting better & did not show any reaction otherwise. His eyes were towards the floor and stated,"Perhaps not enough lately." as he got a drink for a resident and left.

I know I was partly in control because I did not follow through with the other moves instinctively - slide to his inside wrist to push an opening, then other hand strike. But I did not know I did it until I evaluated if I needed to continue by his movement/energy and then looked up to read his eyes.

I honestly do not even think moves as I focus now on standing up, nor have I practiced the arts for over 30 years.

Was this a PTSD moment? Thanks for any insight.

 

[Friday]

For me, a PTSD-moment is when I go further than the situation warrants or when I entirely misread the situation

I often use the example of being punched to illustrate, actually.

PunchA : block, break, throat, sweep, heel to bridge of nose (take down, fast)
PunchB : block, punch, block, punch, etc. (a friendly fight)
PunchC : let it land, send them to their room on timeout or laugh

A : Someone trying to kill me,
B : Friend or similar, no perm damage intended on either side.
C : Kid, &/or no threat whatsoever

There are more 'reaction-compartments' but those are 3 of my most basic / most used ones. When I'm in PTSD-land, those compartments get all f*cked up. I start reacting like someone's trying to kill me when it's just someone saying hello. Or I stand there and take it, like my assailant is a child, instead of someone intent on doing me serious harm. My head is stuck in some other reality, and I am unable to rationally evaluate anything in the moment / on the fly. If I'm lucky I "wake up" before it's too late. I've come really close to seriously hurting someone who was just goofing around. I've also nearly died.

For me if I'd responded how you did? Exactly right, in a split second that allows no time for thought? I'd be doing pretty well. No worries. Good to go. My compartments are up and running exactly how they should be. Maybe not all the time, but at least in that moment.

 

[Recovery4Me]

Thanks @FridayJones ...

I really needed to hear from someone that understood:I was actually frightened. What you offered shows knowledge and that talked me down. Your examples are dead on to what my instructor use to teach for a code of honor.

I am sorry... that you go through it too but appreciate immensely your coming forward.

Time to head butt now...;)or hugs...your choice.

 

[Tanishq]

Recovery4Me, yes this sounds like ptsd moment to me.

The man is sure intimidating from what you have described and sounds like perhaps he enjoys giving pain to others by attacking physically.

You are very intuitive, you read him there.

 

[City Slicker]

It sounds like you responded to all the right cues and used the amount of force you felt necessary to avert the situation and bring it to a conclusion and in this case without anyone getting hurt. I really like what @FridayJones mentioned about the pyramid reaction components - it's what my instructors taught me as well and I still use it to this day.

Sounds like your instincts were right there as well as your 'body memory' of the arts.

 

[Momofthree]

I agree with @FridayJones, I have had military training and worry about 'over using' when triggered but what you did was self-defense and no more. What he is doing is abusive and you are protecting yourself and nothing more. I'll give you an example of a time when I went way above and beyond what was necessary. I was at a friends house and there was a man there I didn't know, we were talking and laughing, he was flirting a bit. Then at one point he called me 'silly' and flicked my forehead playfully. I lost it and the next thing I know I was at his throat, planning to snap his neck, and my best friend was pulling me off of him. What you describe sounds like you were level headed and thinking clearly enough to stop. Good for you!

 

[anthony]

Sounds like a reactive post training instinct. Well done on defending yourself and teaching this person a lesson... not to screw with you. Impressive... congrats.

 

[Recovery4Me]

Thanks everyone for the feed back, the openness and time that you offered. It means a lot to have a group that can actually add valuable information, is supportive, honest and that is trust worthy.

*Also you all are a bunch of bad arshes...I never knew! :clown: Proud of you all!