I been absent on the board because I have been doing very hard work in therapy. I went through alot of panic and withdrawals this past couple months. Also realise I got alot more anger inside me then I was in touch with. It's been painful, but my T and I are working on seeing this in a different light. And he is right, there is going to be alot of days of hurting, flashbacks, panic etc. One, two, breathe...lol. I think I gotten through the worse of it. It's odd to feel so much pain and be motivated to keep going.
We did something different too. We do not use normal therapy words at first to describe thing. We use raw, hardcore language to say things. I guess this is also part of exposure therapy. You can't dress a skunk up to be a turkey. Still working on getting out. Man, this one is the hardest for me to conquer. I am not convinced yet there isn't a sink hole waiting for me somewhere. :cautious:
Hope everyone is doing ok on their own journey. If not, hang in there. In the end all we got is ourselves.I figured I was going to be in pain either working on through this muck or not. Better I meet the pain on my terms. I may mess things up, be stubborn, pissy, avoidant, and the other crud we go through in therapy to try to protect ourselves, but my brain and I are trying to work together on this. In the end of it, I am ok. (That is a very weird concept of being ok even though I want to just run and hide on the otherhand.)
We did something different too. We do not use normal therapy words at first to describe thing. We use raw, hardcore language to say things. I guess this is also part of exposure therapy. You can't dress a skunk up to be a turkey. Still working on getting out. Man, this one is the hardest for me to conquer. I am not convinced yet there isn't a sink hole waiting for me somewhere. :cautious:
Hope everyone is doing ok on their own journey. If not, hang in there. In the end all we got is ourselves.I figured I was going to be in pain either working on through this muck or not. Better I meet the pain on my terms. I may mess things up, be stubborn, pissy, avoidant, and the other crud we go through in therapy to try to protect ourselves, but my brain and I are trying to work together on this. In the end of it, I am ok. (That is a very weird concept of being ok even though I want to just run and hide on the otherhand.)
