Sexual Assault Body Memories? If So, How Do I Get Rid Of It?

[Born to Run]

How exactly would I be able to process that pain though? I mean I thought I had moved on already since thinking about that event doesn't bother me that much anymore

Yes process through therapy, especially a body oriented therapy would be helpful. Your body tells you that you have not moved on, and our brain does like to cover up our inner truth as a defense to the pain that is still there.

 

[_inasense]

Any experiences with somatic or other body orientated therapy?

I didn't mean thoughts, but if that is helpful for sure try that too. Trauma is so much a body thing. I co...

Very informative. I will definitely explore these options in the near future! Not now though, because I searched online and saw that the average per session is very expensive; which poses a problem since I don't work nor do I know if its worth. Also, in general our insurance here don't necessarily cover therapy unless it is affiliated with other insurances or co-pay. Not to mention that there is only a select few who specialize in those categories if any in my area.

However, I will still see my doctor if the symptoms becomes too overwhelming to point where I can't handle it...and right now I still can. And as you mentioned, he could definitely offer me invaluable resources so going there would be the first step in recovery. In the meanwhile, I will just try to adequately cope with this feeling. There's no rush...right?

Although, it really does test my sanity at times s:

Oh! But I had been noticing that whenever the memory of that event pops up, or when I try hard not to consciously think about it, I could feel it. Other times it really is random.

Yes process through therapy, especially a body oriented therapy would be helpful. Your body tells you that you have not moved on, and our brain does like to cover up our inner truth as a defense to the pain that is still there.

Thanks for the insight! I guess my mind really hadn't processed what he was doing to me. I mean after he was done, I just froze for a moment and everything felt surreal; my mind was blank and yet I could feel only one emotion: dread.

So I suppose that in order to fully move on from this I would have to validate the act that was imposed upon me. Huh.

 

[Lucycat]

From what you have put here I would suggest that you need therapy more than or perhaps before a pelvic examination. If the pain was literally constant I would not hesitate to say go now, but clearly it is something that you have now been living with for a year so it may be bad but it is not intolerable.

By that I don't at all mean to dismiss the pain, please don't think that. I just agree with what others have put about it being 'body memories'. I would recommend EMDR for that. I did not have to find the words to describe the trauma, but I had to think about it - for just a few seconds at first- and then consider the thoughts and feelings that those memories brought up. Bit by bit over a period of months I managed to process all (?most)of the memories ( I was sexually abused for years). It is not an easy process but far easier than sitting down just telling your story and not getting anywhere, and far better still than bottling it all up. If you don't give these feelings an outlet at some point you will explode.

Most therapists have seen it all before. You have nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about.

 

[Justanotherme]

Any experiences with somatic or other body orientated therapy?

So this was posted over a year ago and I REALLY hope you've found something to help you out by now but for the sake of maybe you and definitely others reading (like I just was a year later) I suggest calling RAINN. They will help you find resources in your area that are free or based on income. Like someone else said traveling may be necessary if you live in a rural area but in bigger cities there is almost always free women's services for trauma therapy.

Also if You have no job etc. you should be eligible for Medicaid even if just temporarily. I can only speak for the state of Texas and Missouri but as a social worker I refer people to these services frequently.

As for your question on whether or not there's a rush...I would say absolutely yes. The sooner you get in therapy the sooner you can work through this stuff and learn to cope. No one deserves to go through life struggling like this because of some else's evil. You can heal (though some aspects will always be with you). Make sure you take the time to care for yourself.

 

[LanaD]

*Note: disturbing contents.

Hey. Ever since I was sexually assaulted about a year ago, I have been fe...

Our bodies have memories. There's a therapy I'd recommend looking into called haptotherapy. It helps your body remember and let go of its memories. It was developed in the Netherlands and I'm not sure how popular it is elsewhere but definitely worth looking into.