ashdawn8287
Platinum Member
So I was with an abusive guy for 4 years. It happened gradually, it wasn't an over night he hit me one day kind of thing. It went from name calling, terrifying me on purpose, embarrassment-for his own pleasure I presume, pushing, shoving, to hitting, dragging me by my hair, spitting, holding me down, kicking in my doors. All these things grew over time the lines blurred and I couldn't even tell, but by the time I knew it, I was in an abusive relationship and had no voice because of the ridicule.
I guess thinking about that time period in my life is very hazy. This one incident I have never really talked about. I woke up and he was having sex with me. I never thought anything of it until recently when I was at a group therapy session at the Y. One of the therapist said something and it made me think of that. What does that even mean exactly? Like having sex with someone who is asleep....
Also, after that relationship ended I am pretty sure this guy I was hanging out with did something to me while I was asleep. I got blacked out drunk and he did not drink we were just hanging out listening to music and joking around. I don't remember falling asleep or anything at all, but I woke up in my bedroom alone. I woke up feeling like something happened, but wasn't entirely sure. I asked him and of course he said no.
It is all just hazy and I don't know what to make of it or how I feel about it.
I didn't give consent to my ex at all, I woke up during the middle of it (which is just sick and no wonder I have sleep issues-I was molested in my sleep as a child and woke up to it) and was just shocked and didn't say anything. It was never mentioned and I never talked to him about it. I guess I was just in disbelief and shock. I mean that isn't okay is it? We were intimate before that night and we were intimate after that night, but that night I was asleep.
The last I checked in my state both parties have to been drinking when they had sex in order for it not to be rape, and you have to give clear consent, and of course some other things but I forget exactly what they are and if they have changed. I was too shocked like out of my body shock to say anything. So I am not sure.
I was blacked out drunk the other night which is just scary in and of itself and alone with a guy I only knew from school. Would someone really do that in that situation?
It's all just hazy and blurry. I am not sure if I even want to post this because I don't want to be triggered by opinions.
I guess thinking about that time period in my life is very hazy. This one incident I have never really talked about. I woke up and he was having sex with me. I never thought anything of it until recently when I was at a group therapy session at the Y. One of the therapist said something and it made me think of that. What does that even mean exactly? Like having sex with someone who is asleep....
Also, after that relationship ended I am pretty sure this guy I was hanging out with did something to me while I was asleep. I got blacked out drunk and he did not drink we were just hanging out listening to music and joking around. I don't remember falling asleep or anything at all, but I woke up in my bedroom alone. I woke up feeling like something happened, but wasn't entirely sure. I asked him and of course he said no.
It is all just hazy and I don't know what to make of it or how I feel about it.
I didn't give consent to my ex at all, I woke up during the middle of it (which is just sick and no wonder I have sleep issues-I was molested in my sleep as a child and woke up to it) and was just shocked and didn't say anything. It was never mentioned and I never talked to him about it. I guess I was just in disbelief and shock. I mean that isn't okay is it? We were intimate before that night and we were intimate after that night, but that night I was asleep.
The last I checked in my state both parties have to been drinking when they had sex in order for it not to be rape, and you have to give clear consent, and of course some other things but I forget exactly what they are and if they have changed. I was too shocked like out of my body shock to say anything. So I am not sure.
I was blacked out drunk the other night which is just scary in and of itself and alone with a guy I only knew from school. Would someone really do that in that situation?
It's all just hazy and blurry. I am not sure if I even want to post this because I don't want to be triggered by opinions.
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