MummaKitten
New Here
Hi!
I was diagnosed with PTSD at the beginning of the year. It stems from a bad relationship that ended almost 3 years ago. Right now, it's harming my marriage and my children, of which I don't want to happen.
I suffer from disassociative flashbacks. I don't remember anything afterward, so my husband has to clue me in on what happened. I also have GAD and am constantly on edge with hypervigilance. I'm constantly up and down with anxiety and have even questioned if I am bipolar (of which I have been screened for, but it was not enough criteria).
I am going through therapy with sensorimotor processing and somatic experiencing. I've only started a few weeks ago, but so far I haven't had a bad flashback event. I have been using recreational marijuana just to keep myself level as a last resort. It has been helping a lot, but I don't plan on using it for the long term. I'd hate to see my children see me using it.
I'm also going through a bit of an identity crisis, because I don't even know who I am anymore. Most of my daily life seems surreal, though. A lot of times I think it's a dream or a facade of the old life I left behind. So much so, that about a month ago I was in the midst of a panic attack/flashback and, while trying to take my anxiety medication as directed, took too much and ended up in the ICU. My past self wanted to kill me and my present self was simply trying to calm myself down. I don't want my kids to be without me. I'm struggling with keeping my anxiety down at work, now- something of which I have always been able to control.
I was diagnosed with PTSD at the beginning of the year. It stems from a bad relationship that ended almost 3 years ago. Right now, it's harming my marriage and my children, of which I don't want to happen.
I suffer from disassociative flashbacks. I don't remember anything afterward, so my husband has to clue me in on what happened. I also have GAD and am constantly on edge with hypervigilance. I'm constantly up and down with anxiety and have even questioned if I am bipolar (of which I have been screened for, but it was not enough criteria).
I am going through therapy with sensorimotor processing and somatic experiencing. I've only started a few weeks ago, but so far I haven't had a bad flashback event. I have been using recreational marijuana just to keep myself level as a last resort. It has been helping a lot, but I don't plan on using it for the long term. I'd hate to see my children see me using it.
I'm also going through a bit of an identity crisis, because I don't even know who I am anymore. Most of my daily life seems surreal, though. A lot of times I think it's a dream or a facade of the old life I left behind. So much so, that about a month ago I was in the midst of a panic attack/flashback and, while trying to take my anxiety medication as directed, took too much and ended up in the ICU. My past self wanted to kill me and my present self was simply trying to calm myself down. I don't want my kids to be without me. I'm struggling with keeping my anxiety down at work, now- something of which I have always been able to control.
