Sufferer Don't know what to do. child abuse & domestic violence.

[Cathys]

I was diagnosed with ptsd years ago following major domestic violence, prior to that I grew up in a love deprived childhood and regular child abuse.
My now partner of six years isn't the hero I thought he was, I asked him to marry me the other week but he said no, gave various reasons including my self harm...don't know where to go from here...anorexia is back ..on a downward spiral ...scared for myself.....don't want to be here anymore

 

[Fadeaway]

It hurts, but if he lead you to believe that marriage was a possibility, and marriage is what you want, than don't wait around for him. After 6 years years if he still isn't willing to commit, that means he expects the relationship to fail at some point. Ask him why he sticks around?

Don't let him waste any more of your time. You deserve someone more supportive than him.

 

[Sargonnas]

Dear Cathys, has your partner said that he doesn't love you anymore? Has the self harming caused issues between you and him?
Or is the relationship on the rocks.

Reason why I ask these questions is because my partner of 23 years has asked me to marry her on several occasions but for me marriage isn't everything. Its the love you share, its being able to self harm and be judged by him.

Not wanting to living on this earth I can feel your pain as I am in the same situation and have come close to it only the other day.
You see I am also a self harm as an escape from the stresses of the world but it is not the end.

Fight for your relationship, fight for your love but most of all fight for you, cause you are special

 

[scout86]

Are you getting help with this? A partner isn't responsible for fixing you, you have to work on that yourself. He may not know how to be the 'hero' you're looking for. There's a lot that could be going on on his side of things. It seems like it would be a good idea to get the self harm and eating issues under control, regardless of where he's at with the relationship.

A 'hero' is someone who goes above and beyond. Is not really fair to expect someone to be a hero.