EMDR for something I don't remember?

[sprout]

I have these really intense flashbacks about an event/events that I don't have a full recollection of. This is the event we started with during my first emdr session today. Nothing big came up. Nothing even seemed connected. It seemed like a bunch of random events/memories. There were a few glimpses like an image of a ceiling that seemed really far away and me sitting in the bathroom crying that my therapist found interesting but to me the whole thing was a little confusing. The memories that came up spanned a lot of different ages and didn't have a lot of context and I kind of don't know what to think about them. Have any of you done emdr specifically focusing on something you have little recollection of? How was the process for you? What was the flow of memories like? What kind of things came up? Some of mine seemed really mundane and I'm not sure what to do with that.

 

[Skywatcher]

I have done emdr on bizarre flash backs and some childhood events that were really bothering me again. (I remember it bothering me up until my early teens and then me putting it to rest... it came back).

At first, it brought up intense emotions and some basic images. By doing additional sets, overtime a storyline kind of formed of something horrible that I had completely buried. It feels more real than anything, yet I don’t feel that I can 100 percent believe it. I even contacted this childhood friend and asked her. She needed “time” to answer. The hesitation and needing to ask her mom was odd to me because she came back a week later and said nothing happened and there was no way her father would have done those things. If someone had asked me that about my dad, I would have said “no.” I wouldn’t have to think it over and ask my mom. She also doesn’t remember the sexual stuff we did at my house playing in my room. Stuff she had lead. Yet, she remembered one game we played at her house. I don’t know. She did a long term go of therapy for ocd, so maybe that affected her response.

If your imagery is mundane, I wouldn’t try to make it into anymore than it is. If your T finds something significant she would probably say, “okay, think about that” and send you into another set. It may or may not pull out more info. I find that you don’t have to try... these images just appear.

We did start with the memory from my house because it was less scary , but it kept pulling me to her house and to a rape that happened later in my life. I find that the themes are the link (powerless, disgust, shame) in my emdr experiences.

 

[sprout]

My situation is somewhat similar. There was something that I've basically blocked out and can't remember that bothered me in my early teens. I opened up to a family member who was very dismissive and I basically haven't been able to remember the content of those memories since then.

Anyways, I think I'm subconsciously blocking these memories/feelings during EMDR. My flashbacks are really graphic sensation and emotion wise but lack a lot of details. During EMDR whenever I kept inevitably going back to the target I'd get flashes of some details and then immediately switch to something somewhat related in theme (helplessness, powerless, being frozen, being unheard) but much more tolerable. I also started getting new flashes of things but told my therapist the image wasn't changing because I couldn't get the words out :/ We agreed we should go back to talk therapy for now.

Thanks for your response!