Experience with psychiatrist, mostly good but need advice

[Pauline]

Hey guys so I had a bit of a breakthrough today I met with my psychiatrist and he is really good I really trust and feel good with him and very safe but there is one issue I am having and it's really bugging me

I have complex ptsd from previous medical trauma memory loss repeated accidents etc the list could go on, traits of borderline personality have occurred with this and I have been told I have dissociative identity disorder (my childlike states)

I told my psychiatrist I believe I was abused in my childhood but he said that people normally disclose this when this happens I was annoyed he said this because I still feel like something happened to me but I blocked it out and I did mentioned my father to him a month back I want to be able to express to him that deep down I know something doesn't feel right he just things it's medical related I really trust and admire him but I want him to be on my side I don't know I just have that feeling and I can't let it go that something is not right I really like him as a doctor and feel like I can tell him anything but I don't understand why I just can't get to grips with this I just wanted him to be on my side with this it would have felt like a relieve at least someone really knows can someone give me any advice otherwise I really trust him and don't want to change to anyone else X

 

[hithere]

I would ask him how he knows that this is usually disclosed? I find this utterly ridiculous. I can't believe anyone who can READ let alone a psychiatrist believe that it is usually disclosed. Does he live under a rock lately? Did he even remotely pay attention to the #metoo movement? Holy crap. Has he paid ZERO attention to the Catholic Church's law suits and their own extensive studies that show this type of abuse is NOT usually disclosed.

Yeah no wonder you would feel "off" about this doc! Especially if you like him.. He is acting like your own parents probably acted when you were a child. You test the water asking for help, and they DISMISS you. To not let you explore this... I would want to know the reasoning behind his comment. I'm super analytical so I would want to to know why, where's the article, what's the literature say?

Is he the one who gave you the DID label, and is he aware of your dissociative child states? Does he allow these child parts permission to talk to express themselves?

So sorry your doc let you down, in my opinion!

 

[somerandomguy]

I happen to know the statistic for men. Men, on average, disclose 20 years after the abuse happens. So your pdoc is completely and entirely full of shit.

 

[EveHarrington]

Yeah, your doc doesn’t even know what he’s talking about. When I was abused I didn’t even know it was wrong. So why would I run and tell someone?

 

[Sideways]

The comment about “most people disclose” was pretty poor. I think the average time it takes a person to disclose here in Australia is around 27 years.

The attitude, given this is a psychiatrist, rather than another type of therapist, doesn’t surprise me. The extensive medical background training when it comes to repressed memories definitely seems to make a difference.

While T’s coming from a psychology background are often more than happy to start scratching around at potential reppressed memories, the approach of many psychiatrists is completely the opposite.

When a patient confronts a pdoc with “I think I may have repressed memories”...many pdocs have the approach that best practice is to steer clear of that. Many pdocs will tell you they have an ethical obligation to basically not offer any response that could in any way be considered to ‘encourage’ that kind of statement from a patient. Problem is that lack of support too often comes off as they don’t care, or don’t believe you.

If this is something that you would like to explore more? I’d suggest that your pdoc is not the person to do that with. If you have an otherwise excellent relationship with this pdoc, stick with areas that they are willing to work on and help you with, and seek out alternative additional support if your pdoc’s treatment plan isn’t covering all necessary elements of your recovery.

I think probably a lot of members here will tell you that pdocs can be a life-saver within their purview, but are often not the sole type of treatment provider required.

 

[Ronin]

I would tell him exactly what you told us:

That regardless of statistics on this, and what is quote usually disclosed, that is not all that relevant to how you are feeling.... What you need assistance with is your own experience, and the distress those thoughts cause, and that you would appreciate feeling more supported / validated by him, since invalidation just deepens the distress, however well meaning.

 

[grit]

I think probably a lot of members here will tell you that pdocs can be a life-saver within their purview, but are often not the sole type of treatment provider required.

This!
I feel you want to be believed by Him... Not just anyone else. And that is valid for your recovery... After all one of the healing vehicle in therapy is the trust in the therapist. But sometimes the human limitation hits and we notice this person does not think like us or agree with us... Naturally and painfully and at times re-traumatuzing. Because of your relationship, I would note this as a moment of relapse and keep working with him about other things you have acknowledged. But bring this up, on my opinion, as an affect, the feeling evoked. Are you sad you are not heard? Are you angry you are not believed? Are you feeling rejected.... Etc. And work on the feeling which may illuminate deeper issues and may bring you together. Maybe he was avoiding the topic cause he had a bad. day he was nt aware of... Human foibles!