WillyKat
Diamond Member
For several years, I've been toying with the idea of writing a book. It would be about me, my trauma, my PTSD, my story, but it would also weave in my perspective on life and culture and what it means to be human. The last part will be about how much being in the wilderness contributes to my recovery process.
Over the years, I've even put together outlines, but never followed up on actually writing. Now that's changing; I've actually started on the first two chapters (simultaneously)! I have a good outline and I think most of it will flow easily.
There are parts, however, that will require more research, like more vision quests like the one I did last month. (You can check the thread I posted about that.) Now that's the kind of grueling research I will really enjoy.
I've mentioned this idea to my therapist several times. Now is a good time to do it. My current job is not demanding, not anything close to what I've been used to for the past several years, or even my whole career for that matter. (Everybody here says they're busy, so I go with the flow; it's absurd, really.) More importantly, I feel strong enough to go through the hard parts and have a clear enough idea what it will look like. Just actually doing this is improving my mood.
It actually is part of doing something different with my life. I'm really bored with my career. I don't feel like I'm really making a contribution. I want and need to do something meaningful.
The plan is to self-publish. I'm not really interested in going through the rejection, pain, and hassle of a publishing house. I'm not really interested in making money. I even plan on publishing it under an assumed name; I don't want to deal with divulging too much of myself to people that don't understand.
I'm doing this for my tribe, which is fellow PTSD (and other D's) like the good folks on this forum. If it helps even one person, then all the effort this will take will be worth it.
Over the years, I've even put together outlines, but never followed up on actually writing. Now that's changing; I've actually started on the first two chapters (simultaneously)! I have a good outline and I think most of it will flow easily.
There are parts, however, that will require more research, like more vision quests like the one I did last month. (You can check the thread I posted about that.) Now that's the kind of grueling research I will really enjoy.
I've mentioned this idea to my therapist several times. Now is a good time to do it. My current job is not demanding, not anything close to what I've been used to for the past several years, or even my whole career for that matter. (Everybody here says they're busy, so I go with the flow; it's absurd, really.) More importantly, I feel strong enough to go through the hard parts and have a clear enough idea what it will look like. Just actually doing this is improving my mood.
It actually is part of doing something different with my life. I'm really bored with my career. I don't feel like I'm really making a contribution. I want and need to do something meaningful.
The plan is to self-publish. I'm not really interested in going through the rejection, pain, and hassle of a publishing house. I'm not really interested in making money. I even plan on publishing it under an assumed name; I don't want to deal with divulging too much of myself to people that don't understand.
I'm doing this for my tribe, which is fellow PTSD (and other D's) like the good folks on this forum. If it helps even one person, then all the effort this will take will be worth it.
