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Finished My Essay And Handed It In!

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I finished another essay! I handed it in!

Next time I will start early so as not to leave it to the last minute, but that is okay I have learnt so much and improved so much from writing this essay it is phenomenal. I had concentration, I had focus, I was present in this now. Big achievements for me.

I have been getting on top of that distorted thinking much, much better than I ever have. It means I can do things!

I had a really sophisticated idea which I did not incorporate - I should have done it as soon as I got the idea at. The main thing is I did it, and it was the most present I have been doing something like that, pretty much ever.

Disappointed I didn't get to polish it a bit more and I missed a couple of references, but an overall success.

I deserve to remember this time where I am managing my PTSD symptoms. I am being mostly present in my body. Where I am able to have confidence that making decisions will not end up in total abandonment, unending agony, humiliation, shame, desolation, pain, fear, terror and possible near death experiences. So I could concentrate on my work!

Today I am not relieving my childhood/teenage/young adult days and it makes the day so much more pleasant. I just did the work!

I have to remember I got here, it is possible and it can happen! I am writing and I am writing some sophisticated and well thought out work. I am having feelings of being capable, competency and a general sense that I have some control over my life, my thoughts, my memories and how I manage my emotions.

A really great day!
 
Way to go, Ms. Spock!!!! Every accomplishment builds more capacity, and puts you in a more stable place for the future. Practicing being in the present ... is so so so important and valuable.

Congratulations on a really great day!
 
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