General Anaesthesia Triggered A Ptsd Relapse

[MissBSea]

Hello, new here, trying to find others who may relate.I had dental surgery at a hospital OR and also had general anaesthesia for the first time. Typically, not afraid of medical procedures, physical pain, etc. I was worried what waking up would be like and...it was bad. I had to be immediately sedated. The way I woke up, confused, groggy, scared was how I once woke up from being unconscious (on a bar floor) while I was being subjected to Aggravated Sexual Assault (rape). Went there to see my friends (they had a band) play. Did not consume enough alcohol to cause loss of consciousness. Apparently, my friends said after they played (and I had had 2 glasses of wine) and when the bar was closing, I was sitting in a corner crying and screaming and they could not get me to leave. They also said they had never seen me like that before. They chose to leave me there, in a large metropolitan city, 45 minutes from home. I asked afterward why NO ONE called for help (ambulance, police, whatever) but never got a clear response. Personally, I would not have left my friend alone in a bar that was closing. The bartender was the one who raped me, held me down, beat me. I have a scar to this day. Rape kit was done of course, police of little help. Waking up confused while being held down and raped is something I can't forget. The same waking up confused happened at the hospital after the surgery. Something clicked and since then, PTSD is back and kicking my ass. When I last had PTSD, it came 6 months after the rape and I covered all the windows of where I lived and didn't really ever leave the house. I kept a knife and golf club beside my bed, would sleep during the day only. Groceries, meds were delivered. It lasted about 2-3 months. It was bad. After the surgery in early October, I haven't been right. In the summer, I lost a friend to cancer, other friends, keep re-thinking an abortion I had, a car crash I had which was not my fault and made me realize how death can happen at any time, and had a nightmare about the rape and flashbacks. Now I am jumpy, my heart races, I feel nauseaus, panic, severe fight or flight, cry, major anxiety, am afraid to be alone (which is frustrating because I have always lived on my own and am very independent, aside from PTSD moments), afraid to sleep at night...just freaking out! OCD is acting up, and depression is very bad. I went to a doctor after the surgery to try and seek help. Unfortunately, it made everything worse, he discussed that I had to accept SOME responsibility for the rape and that I was not "prudent". WHAT? By that logic, I should never go out anywhere.Waking up after general anaesthesia messed something up. I keep trying to explain this to others and how OBVIOUSLY, I do not CHOOSE to have a PTSD relapse. Who the hell would? Meds not helping much at all. Celexa, Rivotril, Xanax...I am trapped! No one understands this. And I am just completely terrified. Something I hate because I have no control over it.

 

[Seagreen]

As if your story isn't upsetting enough, but reading the comments from your doctor nearly made me vomit. IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT :hug: I hope you can get a new doctor. I am sorry that I cant offer much advice as your post is triggering and I'm unable to get past the ignorance of your doctor. What a moron! What types of treatment other than medications have you already tried? Have you done any processing therapies?

 

[MissBSea]

What types of treatment other than medications have you already tried? Have you done any processing therapies?

SeaGreen, I used to do self-hypnosis in my late teens (which was really just breathing exercises) but no luck. In the past, I have had therapists and behaviour therapy, psychiatrists and such, many meds and med trials and this was for Anxiety and Depression. As for the doctor, I contacted the local newspaper, the College of Physicians and Surgeons and plan to pursue my complaint in the hopes that NO ONE ELSE is "re-victimized" by this doctor. It was at an emergency walk-in clinic.

 

[Seagreen]

As for the doctor, I contacted the local newspaper, the College of Physicians and Surgeons and plan to pursue my complaint in the hopes that NO ONE ELSE is "re-victimized" by this doctor. It was at an emergency walk-in clinic.

Thank you for taking a stand against this kind of behaviour. Its not something many of us could do.

I was treated for anxiety and depression too but it didn't help much at all. Eventually finding a therapist that specialises in trauma and receiving EMDR treatment made a huge difference.