How Do I Handle This?

[FindingMyself88]

because it's like "if you want my meds and my issues, I'd be glad for you to take them off my hands", you know? It's definitely really invalidating. .

Exactly! I'm just over it, thats why I don't make many friends my age. It's just not worth trusting them...

 

[Deleted member 19804]

I just want to say that you are not at all a bad friend for thinking this way. In fact, I think it is very strong to think about what's happening and asking for advice, instead of letting your friend walk all over you.

Also: just because someone is nice to you, you don't have to becomd close friends with them. Like in love relationships, there has to be "chemistry" and a good connection between friends as well. If the friendship isn't working for you, you have every right to end it or bring it down to the acquaintance-level.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

No, you're not a bad person. Based on what you said, I kinda doubt her diagnosis. "Being picked on" as a kid doesn't cause PTSD. Being bullied as a kid can cause PTSD. Yes, there is a difference! I think she's more in the "being picked on" category. Nobody who was traumatized as a kid says "I guess it was bad". Most of us are like "eff that bully!"

I disclosed my diagnosis to a friend and she gave me an enthusiastic "ME TOO!' I literally wanted to punch her because I felt completely invalidated.

PTSD isn't a bonding factor. I am very much in the "if you have PTSD, too, then I cannot be your friend" camp. Ok, this sounds harsh, but it is actually a boundary I have set up for myself in order to protect my own healing. That friend with PTSD? Well, we're still friends, albeit on a very distant level. My aunt also has PTSD and she'll always be family to me. What I mean is that I don't seek out new relationships with sufferers as PTSD isn't a healthy basis for a relationship for me at this point, nor do I think it would ever be. There is too much of a risk of me triggering someone else, or of them triggering me. Oddly though, I can have friends who have anxiety, just not PTSD. Go figure.