How does your t approach your anxiety in sessions?

[Deleted member 42665]

We walk. Every single session unless its too cold but then we will walk inside the building a few laps....its my comfort zone and calms me down so much.

Also we sit on the floor, I get super anxious in chairs and my leg just goes crazy up and down so sitting on the floor is very calming.

I also am allowed to bring my dog along, which helps and sometimes I choose not to, and so my therapist allows me to sit near him.

 

[barefoot]

@DogLover33 Thanks for sharing what works for you.

The walking idea really appeals to me. I think I would feel much more comfortable with talking in sessions in general - not just when my anxiety is sky high - if we were wandering outside, walking beside each other, instead of sitting opposite looking at each other. Unfortunately, my therapist is based in central London so going outside would mean walking around in hoardes of crowds, which obviously wouldn’t work. And inside the building, it’s only a matter of a few strides to get to her room’s door and then another few to get to the stairs. So, not really any chance for roaming.

We did go and stand on the landing last session when I had got into a highly anxious/starting to dissociate state and I think even that physical shift did help to ground me a bit and I didn’t end up full-on dissociating. So, perhaps that is something for me to remember and maybe something to tell my T for future reference - that if I can get up, it might help to nip things in the bud so that disssociation doesn’t escalate.

The sitting on the floor suggestion is interesting and really appeals to me too. A few times, I have taken flip chart sheets with brainstorms on that I have done at home and then taken I to talk through with her. I find that really helpful. The first couple of times, I sat on the floor so that I could more easily see the sheet and point at things etc. And I found something quite comforting about that, I think. It felt quite grounding. And, actually, sitting on the floor, I sar much closer to my T than I normally would - I usually sit at the furthest point away from her possible! But sitting on the floor with the paper where we could both see it meant sitting really close to her (she was on a chair, not on the floor with me) and I really liked it (ugh!)

The slight spanner in the works with me sitting on the floor was that it was physically uncomfortable but, after a successful surgery last year I think I would find it much easier now. So, maybe now is a good time to try the floor again.

So, your T sits on the floor with you? Curious about how you sit together eg beside each other, facing each other etc? Did you ask him to sit on the floor with you or did you sit on the floor and he just followed you down there?

Thanks for these good suggestions - they really resonate

 

[Deleted member 42665]

@DogLover33 Thanks for sharing what works for you.

The walking idea really appeals...

It's actually interesting how the floor thing started. Back in May, I brought my old dog, who has since passed, with me to session for first time and he was super antsy so my T tried to make him calm by sitting on the floor with him, well after a bit, I felt silly in a chair and them on the floor so I joined them. Then it hit me how amazing that felt, so I asked him if we could start doing that and every single session since they, we both do. Sometimes he sits first even LOL

Usually we sit closer than we would in chairs but I don't sit super close to him unless my other dog is not with me. We usually pick different spots and sometimes it gets super casual, we put our legs out by each other and my dog lays on our legs lol.... idk, it's different every week but now we make jokes about the chairs because I refuse to sit in them anymore. He says I am his only client he does this with but he notices it works for me so he is happy to do it

So if you want to try it, just ask. it might seem weird, honestly if he had not with my dog, I probably would have never asked, but she may say yes and surprise you. Good luck

 

[barefoot]

That sounds really lovely @DogLover33

The first time I sat on the floor with the sheet of paper, my T made a comment about feeling odd because she was still sitting on a chair (I think because it meant she was higher up than me). Not sure whether that was meant to be my cue to invite her onto the floor with me but I didn’t say anything. Another time she said it seemed to really work for me and created good energy when I was on the floor and she said something about how she loved to sit on the floor. But, again, I didn’t say anything!

So, maybe I’ll do another mind map and get on the floor and try to casually ask if she wants to sit on the floor with me. It will feel weird and I’ll probably feel awkward but I think I can push myself to ask if I actually go with that intention. She wears dresses and high heels so not sure whether she would want to be. May not be very practical!