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Huge chunk of life memories missing

SusanPLC

Learning
I can feel the fragments from the early years coming together (all who saw the original birth name as their name) but am still missing loads from mid 20's to mid 40's.

although I know technically 'this body' lived that life during that time. I remember the early life our last dog (when I had my first flat)..in fact I remember her whole life which means I must have at least some of that’s host’s memories integrated within me? ...but it's like a big holey blanket..I can peer through and see times enjoyed with our dog but then there's the bits you can't see through blacked out cos of the material in front of your eyes...if that makes any sense?

Sill I'm told that no-one can remember every moment of their entire life anyway but it does feel a bit like I went 'to sleep' shortly after my mum died ...then someone else took over for the next 20 years... left me a few memories then vanished and suddenly I'm back at the front in a very different life and era!
:shock:
It just feels odd there's a whole part of MY life I can't relate to AT ALL! It's very disorientating!

I guess it feels similar maybe to being in a coma for years and you can hear life going on around you but can’t get to the front …. Then when you do ‘wake up’ .. your life as you knew it has changed beyond all recognition and someone has legally changed your name while you ‘were away’

Has anyone else experienced this?
 
For years I felt like I was living in a kind of bubble, where I just looked out at the world and didn't really interact much. Since being in therapy, I feel like I am waking up. I see things and understand things that I just didn't my whole life.
 
Sill I'm told that no-one can remember every moment of their entire life anyway but it does feel a bit like I went 'to sleep' shortly after my mum died ...then someone else took over for the next 20 years...
PTSD amnesia. As you deal with trauma your mind slowly unlocks some stuff. But yeah. It's real. It happens.
 
I can feel the fragments from the early years coming together (all who saw the original birth name as their name) but am still missing loads from mid 20's to mid 40's.

although I know technically 'this body' lived that life during that time. I remember the early life our last dog (when I had my first flat)..in fact I remember her whole life which means I must have at least some of that’s host’s memories integrated within me? ...but it's like a big holey blanket..I can peer through and see times enjoyed with our dog but then there's the bits you can't see through blacked out cos of the material in front of your eyes...if that makes any sense?

Sill I'm told that no-one can remember every moment of their entire life anyway but it does feel a bit like I went 'to sleep' shortly after my mum died ...then someone else took over for the next 20 years... left me a few memories then vanished and suddenly I'm back at the front in a very different life and era!
:shock:
It just feels odd there's a whole part of MY life I can't relate to AT ALL! It's very disorientating!

I guess it feels similar maybe to being in a coma for years and you can hear life going on around you but can’t get to the front …. Then when you do ‘wake up’ .. your life as you knew it has changed beyond all recognition and someone has legally changed your name while you ‘were away’

Has anyone else experienced this?

Hi there. Yes, I think I can relate well. When I try to ecompass the story of my life, there is no singular "red thread", no "first this, then that, then that". It is not even linear, I can not grasp a story with a plot. I can not even introduce myself properly, as it turns out (funny story). Recently I had a sensation like when you are waking up from having been asleep, but instead of it being an isolated sensation, like when actually waking up in the morning, it has been present as a part of many familiar, ordinary scenes, from eating to saying hi to someone or doing something that seems ordinary. Most notably I had this clear, unsettling and strange realization of how old everyone has become. Faces that felt like they had aged tens of years from when I last saw them. This is more or less my everyday life, I see things in a certain way and remembering things from my life, and then I dont, and I can not even really remember it being different, until it is different. If I take this moment as an example, and this has been the case for at least a couple of days and more or less the same at all times, I can basically not remember anything of my life until now. With that I mean, I can get flashes, I "know" certain things/facts, but I can not recall any story at all, I have no real feeling for having lived before this moment, no context or very vague context, I can not recall yesterday but the feeling for yesterday is like you can have for a dream that was not even that clear to begin with, and I know there are important things I should do right now, and that what I am doing is not what I should be doing, but I am not bothered, it just feels like it has little to do with me, although I know it has very much to do with me.
Digging in to these feelings right now, normally I just move and keep moving and it works out rather well, but since you asked I wanted to confirm that I recognize myself much. Best wishes.
 
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