I can't sleep

[Strangelongtrip]

I know it's because I'm stressed about exams but it's getting ridiculous. Maybe 12 hours altogether since Monday, and most of it nightmare laden. My last exam is tomorrow (before a whole new set of classes starts), and I haven't been able to study everything yet. Because I can't sleep, I've started to have REALLY bad anxiety attacks. Worse I've had in months, since maybe January. I can't breathe, hyperventilating, etc. I tried to go to bed at 9pm or so and now less than 3 hours later I'm awake again. I don't remember it being this bad for the past two years, but I have a million other things going on and my stress cup is overflowing (med change, family financial issues, upcoming move, family drama that I can't even talk about, geopolitical issues that could make things dangerous for loved ones, exams, finance terror, anniversary dates). I can't handle anything else. I want to scream and cry I just want to effin sleep. The fact that I have another 6-7 hours until the morning is making me want to die. I've tried everything I know how to do other than exercise. I feel like I don't have time this week to do more than quick walks like I'm stuck on the fact that I barely had time to study for my exams but I somehow am supposed to fit in an hour at least three times a week for exercise. I feel wired, I don't know what else to do. I've taken baths, listened to music, taken medicinal cannabis that usually knocks me out for all night (and I don't want to take anymore for fear of making it worse), not been on any screens after 7:30pm, read books, done aromatherapy. I just can't do it anymore I'm so tired I don't know what to do.

 

[blackemerald1]

This sounds terrible @Strangelongtrip - and I'm with you in respect of suffering from insomnia - I've been there so much and so often. I've tried lots of stuff too, except for the Cannabis bc it's not legal here.

Sometimes I can get into a rigid schedule that will help me sleep if I stick to it.

But either of two things may happen... one... I have to deviate from the schedule and it throws my sleep out of kilter or secondly my anxiety, depression, pain, ptsd or life get too big. Sleep always suffers then.

It sucks so I'm with you in spirit on this.

You mention that you have had to drop/alter your exercise schedule because you are having a problem finding the time.

The only thing I suggest is that you should drop something else and do that exercise. If anything is going to force your brain and body to settle a little it might be exercise. It certainly helps me. If you've dropped it from your normal schedule it might be one of the many reasons why you're currently so unsettled. At least it is solvable. So go do it.

Studying for examinations create's stress too. I don't know what to say to comfort you, other than after the examination is over give yourself a short break. Even a few hours before you throw yourself into solving or managing all of those other issues.

And lastly, please remember that worrying about things that you cannot solve is a terrible punishment to inflict upon yourself. So go gently and stop yourself if you find you are preoccupied by that sort of thing. Do what you can and release the rest.

Sweet dreams if they come. :hug:

 

[Strangelongtrip]

Thank you so much @blackemerald1 . I ended up doing a little mini workout in my room after posting this (I jogged around for 10 minutes and did some yoga) and I made a mental list of things under my control and things that aren't under my control, and things that are happening now and things that are happening in the future. I'm going to write it all down after my exam and have it to refer to! I got about 7 hours of sleep finally ?

And lastly, please remember that worrying about things that you cannot solve is a terrible punishment to inflict upon yourself. So go gently and stop yourself if you find you are preoccupied by that sort of thing. Do what you can and release the rest.

Thank you!!

 

[blackemerald1]

I got about 7 hours of sleep finally

^Yay! Magic... now go and smash that exam!

Maybe it was writing out your feelings and a little bit of exercise...?? Doesn't matter seven beautiful hours of sleep were yours... and that means it can certainly happen again. Yess!

 

[Fahrenheit451]

Hi Strangelongtrip.
My psychologist recommended a book to me called The Relaxation and Stress Reduction Workbook. It’s very comprehensive and deals with a lot of different kinds of stress. One method in the book that has really worked for me for sleeping is counting breaths as you’re laying in bed. When you inhale that’s 1 and when you exhale that’s 2. You only count to 4 and then start over. The idea is to fixate on the counting and not on what’s keeping you awake. If you lose track and think of something else then you simply start over at 1.
Glad to hear you got some good sleep the other night.

 

[Strangelongtrip]

Hi @Fahrenheit451 (that's one of my favorite books!!) thank you!! I'll check that out, and try the breathe counting. I know I have so much stress in my life right now, it'd be good to manage it better!

 

[Strangelongtrip]

I still am not sleeping well. I sleep in 3 hour bits, usually two of them, then I give up and just watch a show or do my work. I don’t really feel tired but I was so depressed I ached recently. No matter what I do it doesn’t work. I’ve tried low impact cardio, high impact cardio, sleep hygiene, Benadryl, cannabis (this seems to help the most—I can get a whole *six straight hours*), hot baths, meditation, yoga, soothing tea, reading before bed, everything. I kinda have given up at this point, I’ve reduced my stress in every way currently possible and it’s not working.