I'm A Crazy Social Worker

[Riled]

Well Hello- I'm reaching out to this new group for some support. My struggle with PTSD started with witnessing domestic violence and child abuse. Things continued with sexual harassment by a college professor. The next year I was sexually assaulted and administered a "date rape" drug. I made it through college and began working as a Social Worker- yes I see the irony. Since that time I've had 2 premature children. One who spent a month in the NICU. I almost died and wasn't able to see my son for 3 days after his birth. I also had a miscarriage in between children. My father and grandmother died about 2 years ago. I had a hysterectomy and went through surgical menopause. The surgery had complications which has caused much pain. All during this time I've worked as a medical social worker in hospice. I help the dying and their families. I am constantly exposed to the death and illness. Writing this makes me realize what a complete crazy ride this life has been.

By writing this I hope I can begin to work through the back log of issues. Being a social worker has driven me to silence about my mental illness. I have seen counselors, take antidepressants/anti-anxiety, and sleep meds daily. I've never really spoken to a fellow survivors about this experience however. Hoping this can help me cope more effectively with my issues and help me figure out what I want to do with my life.

Thanks again

 

[NIKI]

Hi Riled, Just wanted to say welcome and I hope you can find some help here. I also have CPTSD from witnessing domestic violence and child abuse. I still struggle with it daily, but coming to this site to vent or just see what others are thinking or talking about helps. Talk to you later, NIKI

 

[Dougal]

Hi Riled. In a similar career. Lucky for me I have been able to be accommodated in the workplace doing what I enjoy and what I do best / restricted from the things that are not healthy for me. And have the support from the chain of command (most of the time). Have gained the self awareness I need to know the difference between what is healthy and what is a re-enactment / trigger. All good stuff. Takes time.

 

[anni]

Hi Riled,

I'm almost never on at night, and if so then am just browsing for company's sake after a shattering sort of day. You kind of got me with your 'completely crazy ride this life has been', Ditto, and was with you somewhere in the NICU, after that rather identical surreal few days in recovery.Only one trip there for me, though-two premies! It tugs my heart to think of that. There have been, wierdly, copious reminders lately of the crazy ride, hence more visits here than usual. It's not a great evening for writing and would doubtless mispell horrifically if tried too much more but wanted to say you're very much in the right place, although I'm sorry for the reasons you got here. I also admire the bejeesis out of social workers - I'm not overly religious but if that's not God's work I don't know what would be.

I hope to see you back here when you can. It is a nice, peaceful place after all the craziness, to be sure!

Take care,

Anni