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Is this PTSD? PTSD Diagnostic

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Dubside

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I will keep it short as i can to tell you the story of my condition..

3 years ago (i was 18) i had a group of friends that we used to smoke marijwana togather every day,.. after a short period they started to abuse me every time we get high (while smoking marijwana) but in a strange way.. they used to refer to me while they talk together (in a hidden meanings or indirect way) as a girl or sissy guy(which iam actually not).. by commenting on some actions or things i've said as if they are talking about some girl or someone else (not me)... but i was taking that as a reference or abuse to me cause they were including things that relate to my action/hisotry/activities/things i've said... (don't know why they were doing that.. i used to think that maybe because iam too thin or have a bad look image or look too young)
i didn't stop meeting them afterwards cause they were my only source for marijwana.. so i kept experiencing this stress for a bout a year or less... and if i someday got angry or made a problem with them or tell them why they are abusing me.. they always said we were not talking about you!..
at that time and later i started to feel very strange when iam out on the streets or in a crowd of people.. i used to feel that people are watching me and watching my actions and how i behave so they relate that of me being sissy or acting like girls) i used to feel very uncomfortable among people or stranger or on the streets.. sometimes feel like car horns are ment as if drivers are noticing that iam looking like a sissy or a girl or acting like to.. sometimes feel like that people on the streets are noticing that too and will try to abuse me indirectly as what happened to me before with me friends... and what it drives me crazy is when iam with people wheather or not i know them or family and there is a conversation about girls or sissies i feel like they are talking about me or abusing me in an indirect way ir refering to me.. another thing to that happens with me alot which is if iam watching a movie or something with any friends or people and someone comment on an actress on the movie i think they are using the movie to abuse me indirectly or to refer to me... even if iam sure this is not true.,. i sometimes fear that a girl on the movie (or a talking about girl) say thing or have thing which i've said/have make people notice that its refering to me and notice that iam anixous to that so they think that iam feeling sissy or so...also if iam listening to a song that talking about girls among people or firends, i feel very uncomfortable

beside that, i started to lack joy of anything that used to enjoy me.. lost all friends... stopped collage and iam having a hardtime alone

anyway i stopped the marijuwana used to go to doctors, tried many medications like anafranil, risperdal, seroxat, seroquel but still suffering..

is that ptsd ? or a schizophrenic thing ?
what is happening to me ?
 
Hi Dubside,

Welcome to the forum. Firstly, doesn't sound like friends to me if they are constantly attacking you to begin with. Secondly, PTSD is a complicated beast when you get to the diagnosis stage. You sound like you have a trauma from what was traumatic for you, though I am not absolutely sure about that. To actually have PTSD, you need to suffer several key symptoms to be diagnosed. You could just have posttraumatic stress, which is very curable through good counselling.

It actually kind of sadens me telling people like yourself that you could have PTSD, as it is something I would never wish upon anyone. Firstly, you need to look at what symptoms you have, a [DLMURL="http://www.ptsdforum.org/thread84.html"]PTSD self diagnosis[/DLMURL] as such. the below is a list of PTSD symptoms, or you can read the full list of [DLMURL="http://www.ptsdforum.org/thread6.html"]posttraumatic stress disorder symptoms[/DLMURL] here.

Basically, you MUST have a traumatic event to have PTSD. Without that, chances are you have an offshoot or partial components of PTSD, which can be cured with medication and good counselling. PTSD cannot be cured, and is a life long illness. You don't need all the below to be diagnosed with PTSD, but a high percentage of them, and the main area comes from the strength of each, which depends whether PTSD exists or not. You could have all the below symptoms, but have them so mildly or infrequently, that you would not be diagnosed with PTSD, and could be cured:
  • recurring memories of the traumatic event which you can't seem to get out of your mind - Intrusive Thoughts
  • recurring dreams of the trauma - Bad Dreams & Nightmares
  • feeling that the traumatic event was happening again (hallucinations, flashbacks) - Reliving The Trauma
  • things or events act as triggers which remind you or resemble your traumatic event - Flashbacks
  • these triggers or reminders make you feel nervous, tense, generate panic attacks - Panic Attacks
  • purposely avoiding thoughts, feelings or conversations about trauma - Withdrawn
  • deliberately avoiding activities, places and situations about the trauma - Phobias
  • when trying to recall the traumatic event you are unable to recall or remember certain things or important aspects that had happened - Memory Loss
  • losing interest in people, things and activities (family, friends and hobbies) which were important to you prior to the traumatic event - Lack of Motivation
  • feeling more emotionally estranged, separated or feeling cut off from others - Alienation
  • feeling a markedly reduced ability to feel emotions, especially those associated wtih intimacy, tenderness and sexuality - Lacking Emotions
  • difficutly falling or staying asleep - Poor Sleep
  • experiencing irritability or outbursts of anger - Rage
  • difficulty concentrating on tasks or completing tasks - Poor Concentration
  • feeling overtly alert or watchful when you don't need to be - Ever Watchful
  • having strong startle reactions - Edgy
  • worrying about coping with everyday situations - Lack of Confidence
  • difficulty keeping a regular job - Work Difficulties
I hope that list helps you a bit more. How do you rate yourself from that list of symptoms?
 
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I really don't know, and i have been misdiagnosed many times by doctors..

also i don't know if what iam experiencing (feeling people are abusing me the same way happened before as being a girl or sissy) is supposed to be "Reliving The Trauma" ?

or what iam on the other hand is paranoia or delusions (something like schizophrenia or schizophrenic disorders)
 
sounds to me its the drug repocussions that are your own "beast"....its something i think thousands of australians deal with Im sure.
But its hardly PTSD though - you will have no idea what someone with this actually goes through.

I think you are just peeling off being paranoid from previous drug use and i havent taken drugs myself but im sure its a gradual thing which will wear off once its out of ur system. Hang in there !
 
Feelings of the original problem, is "reliving the trauma". Honestly, you would need to seek professional help with counselling and doctors to get full diagnosis. You in Ontario I believe? You would need to get on the phone to your National help line, who could send you to a more specific doctor or counsellor that deals with PTSD, and they could assess your problems, your trauma (if exists), and tell you exactly what is going on.

How do you stack yourself, ie. feelings and actions, compared to other posts you can read on this forum from those who are diagnosed with PTSD? That may also help you to understand whether you feel or think similar things, whether your actions are similar, and that would certainly help yourself with your doctors and counsellors.

It is hard to say whether a person "has" PTSD or not, especially when you haven't met them. Even talking with a person once or twice face to face, you wouldn't know they had PTSD unless they where having a bad day with things... this is why you really need to seek a better doctor or support network first, to ascertain correct diagnosis of your individual problems, then when a doctor has actually diagnosed you, you know for sure what the problem is, and can start learning about it.
 
what makes me wonder here is that i am with a doctor these days and iam on seroquel drug.. and nothing changed,...
before i was with another doctor on seroxat for a period, and another on on respirdal... and nothing improved till now on the kind of paranoia iam having!

i will try to tell you what is on my mind that i want to try to find out..

1-i think what i've experienced with those friends is abuse! right? lets say its an abusive relationship..

2- due to my searches on the net of the results of an exessive time to abuse or bullying is commonly anixity and stress, depression and mostly ptsd..

the only diferences that applies to my condition and this is not what i didnt get info on the net and searches is:

1-the kind of abuse or bullying that happened to me is different ( because lets say common abuse that a male may get is abuses to him on the basis that he is a male.. ie: an abusive indirect comment to him as abuse may be "he is a fag.." for example, but my abuses was based on the opposed gendre "ie: she is a fag!" got the idea ?

2-most risks that is on the net for abuses applies on a normal state of mind of the victim,.. where mine is different cause i was getting abuse under the infulence of marijwana...

that is what making me don't know whats the problem... also doctors i went to seems that they are just giving me medications.. and don't know whats the case..

one of the things that iam experiencing latetly that i keep watching shows and movies and scan what men are behaving, saying.. and i try to copy their behaviors..

also when iam on the streets.. i keep focusing on myself in an high degree, as if iam watching myself...

also lately my from about 2 years, my tastes on music and movies for example has changed..

for example.. in music i changed from listning to pop,.. to pink floyd, the doors,.. and only this kind of stuff,..

for movies.. i started to only watch movies that only are in the same pattern of movies like "fight club" "as good as it gets" ..etc

i would talk in years if you want to know the amount on changes that happened to me..!
 
I think I would have to agree with Ben, on the aspect I don't think what your suffering is PTSD. I say this, because the things your saying do not reflect the symptoms of a person with PTSD. I understand you are looking for an answer, but if doctors are treating you, and they aren't diagnosing you with PTSD, then I doubt you have it. PTSD is much much more than what your describing your feelings and events that have occurred.

With or without the use of drugs, PTSD is an illness which clearly stands out, and people cannot replicate the symptoms without actually having it, because its not a matter off having one, two or even five or more of the symptoms, it is the specifics contained within each of the symptoms which is how PTSD is diagnosed.

Any doctor who has had someone with PTSD, would know it, thus they would know if you haven't got it also. Whilst you suffer depression, anxiety and a few other things, that doesn't negate having PTSD. As stated previously, what you could simply have is PTS, or posttraumatic stress, which is often found in people who suffered something traumatic, though they haven't been fully inflicted with all the traits to be categorized as having the "disorder" of the illness. Women who have bad births can often get PTS, car accidents another example. A person can get stressed, anxious and depressed, though not have PTSD, it more a fact that they just need good counselling to talk about their particular issues.

I think you need to get good counselling, not neccesarily doctors prescribing you medications. Counsellors can get to the core of the problem, and you will most likely find yourself getting better as a result. The use of drugs during your abuse really has little impact on PTSD symptoms, or whether you would be more succeptable to it. The fact is, you need a significant trauma to have PTSD.

Here is the actual definition of posttraumatic stress disorder:

A psychological disorder affecting individuals who have experienced or witnessed profoundly traumatic events, such as torture, murder, rape, or wartime combat, characterized by recurrent flashbacks of the traumatic event, nightmares, irritability, anxiety, fatigue, forgetfulness, and social withdrawal.
From what you are saying, you really don't fit into the definition of PTSD.

This is what the wikipedia say on posttraumitic stress disorder, and please note the bolded sentence:

Experiences likely to induce the condition include childhood physical/emotional or sexual abuse, adult's experiences of rape, war and combat exposure, violent attacks, natural catastrophes, and life-threatening complications at childbirth (and perhaps its accompanying exhaustion). For most people, the emotional effects of traumatic events will tend to subside after several months. If they last longer than that then consideration should be given to diagnosing a psychiatric disorder. Most people who experience traumatic events will not develop PTSD. PTSD is primarily an anxiety disorder and should not be confused with normal grief and adjustment after traumatic events. There is also the possibility of simultaneous suffering of other psychiatric disorders (i.e. co-morbidity).
 
Hi,
For my money some of the treatment for whatever is troubling you and the treatment for PTSD can be the same. This may be counter to what many people who have PTSD have been told. People with or without PTSD have traumas in their past (and sometimes ongoing in the present). Resolving these traumas can make a very big difference to our current life, but it may not resolve all of the difficulties you are experiencing. Anthony’s advice is good and I hope you find a good counsellor and are eventually able to get away from the medicating. They may help you cope in the short term while you seek help with issues, but they can seldom be more than that unless one cannot function without them as is the case with some serious conditions.

Another thought. You have expressed that you could give long accounts and explanations about your feelings and experiences. I contend that any five typical therapists would give you five different explanations about these with the aim of you feeling better and healing. It is my belief that the best therapies are the ones that lead to the client (patient) during the therapeutic process, coming to their own conclusions which bring about small and big gains. I say this because I would like you to feel that explaining the “whole story’ may not be necessary in order for you to get real improvement with your concerns. Often, specific events, handled properly, can bring improvements right across the board, without the need to feel that all of our feelings need to be remembered or understood.

Whatever you are diagnosed as having, remember it’s just a label, to help specialists to design an approach to help you. If you experience anxiety on a daily basis then you are likely to have incidents related to the anxiety and addressing them is going to help.
Go well,
 
PTSD is the long hard walk out of a traumatic event.
Any old person can have anxiety or phobias or whatever - which are normal human situations. Its PTSD which is something forced onto a person that makes it many levels above.
 
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