It's Getting Harder To Fight These Feelings

[Annicus]

I can't seem to shake these feelings of worthlessness,self loathing, obcessive, violent and scary thoughts. The worst part is that I take it out on my wife ( who has done nothing). This dragon suddenly appears and destroys anything close without provacation. I can't help but feeling like a complete waste of space. I wonder why do I torture people with my sad pathetic exsistance. I hate this monster in my head. Sorry if I am rambling nonsense, I don't know where to turn.

 

[Hopeful1989]

Don't give up. It's hard and seems unbearable but it will get better you have to believe that. Focus on channeling those feelings into something. When I feel depressed I write and listen to music. It will get better, don't give up and let this thing win...human nature is stronger than we realize. Don't beat yourself up for feeling sad...just realize what it is and address it. I know it's not as easy as it sounds. But people do hear you. You are not a waste, you are needed.

 

[Lionheart]

It has been my experience that fighting feelings, whatever they may be, is an exercise in futility. For me, it was numbing out to my feelings that caused them to build up to overwhelming intensity in the first place. In the light of trauma, feelings of worthlessness and self-loathing make sense and tell me that you are suffering from low self-esteem. If you are taking your problems out on others then perhaps you should change this behavior and your feelings about yourself will change accordingly.

Obsessive thoughts can take awhile to tame. I had to have professional help to do this. I can only suggest these things because they have worked for me. You will need to experiment with different strategies to find what works for you. Keep posting about your feelings, it will help to keep them more manageable.

 

[Annicus]

Thanks for the advice Lion. I will keep posting. It does seem to at least get the feelings out of my head.

 

[Pandoras3of9]

I know how you feel. I've found prolonged exposure therapy has helped me deal with feelings I forgot I had. Today at least, I feel a peace with the world. Its really hard dealing with strong emotions. Are you avoiding thinking about the trauma or its reminders?