Seasounds
Diamond Member
First the context:
As some of you may know that I've been in a deep PTSD crisis-my life turned upside down, after a man threatened my life, after he verbally and emotionally harassed me in a public place.
Since then, I've plugged away at activities that have helped put me back into a position of power, and move me through my fear of death, by doing self-defense classes and handgun safety classes/pistol shooting.
And still, I noticed, that my thoughts and behaviors were demonstrating that I was getting more depressed. To myself, I thought, "Is this a product of aging-that PTSD is a progressive condition? "Is it from decreasing light in the Northern Hemisphere?"
Unwilling to settle do anything but functional behavior, I raked my brain for what else I could do, or what I hadn't thought of, to help myself. Simultaneously, I knew that for such a big trauma my healing was relatively on course. My therapist was working with me, on this project, too.
Then, one of those moments occurred, when I looked at the gray October skies-that mirrored my waning sunshine, and a thought came to me: just after this recent aggravation, I switched to the generic form of my SSRI.
Now, 7 weeks later, could I be worse due to the generic drug and not just from the trauma? Could this be why I am I so depressed-that I want to lie frozen a lot more than before (despite very loud and annoying construction noises going on outside my windows for the past month)? Is this why I find myself singing, "I gotta get out of this place, if it's the last thing that I ever do."
I remembered in the past, I switched to a brand name SSRI since it had less side effects. than the generic form. This made me curious to find and try a few remaining tabs of the brand name of my current SSRI.
Yesterday, after one dose of the brand name, I was 50% better. Today, I took a second dose, and I'm 75% better than I was a week ago!!!! (I've always been sensitive to beginning doses of SSRIs.)
I'm so happy to get back to my normal baseline-on an SSRI that works, so I can more effectively work through this big trigger (of childhood death threats from my parents). Some new life in me!
Celebrate with me, you are part of my success. Love and thanks to you all, for your support through bad and good times!!
As some of you may know that I've been in a deep PTSD crisis-my life turned upside down, after a man threatened my life, after he verbally and emotionally harassed me in a public place.
Since then, I've plugged away at activities that have helped put me back into a position of power, and move me through my fear of death, by doing self-defense classes and handgun safety classes/pistol shooting.
And still, I noticed, that my thoughts and behaviors were demonstrating that I was getting more depressed. To myself, I thought, "Is this a product of aging-that PTSD is a progressive condition? "Is it from decreasing light in the Northern Hemisphere?"
Unwilling to settle do anything but functional behavior, I raked my brain for what else I could do, or what I hadn't thought of, to help myself. Simultaneously, I knew that for such a big trauma my healing was relatively on course. My therapist was working with me, on this project, too.
Then, one of those moments occurred, when I looked at the gray October skies-that mirrored my waning sunshine, and a thought came to me: just after this recent aggravation, I switched to the generic form of my SSRI.
Now, 7 weeks later, could I be worse due to the generic drug and not just from the trauma? Could this be why I am I so depressed-that I want to lie frozen a lot more than before (despite very loud and annoying construction noises going on outside my windows for the past month)? Is this why I find myself singing, "I gotta get out of this place, if it's the last thing that I ever do."
I remembered in the past, I switched to a brand name SSRI since it had less side effects. than the generic form. This made me curious to find and try a few remaining tabs of the brand name of my current SSRI.
Yesterday, after one dose of the brand name, I was 50% better. Today, I took a second dose, and I'm 75% better than I was a week ago!!!! (I've always been sensitive to beginning doses of SSRIs.)
I'm so happy to get back to my normal baseline-on an SSRI that works, so I can more effectively work through this big trigger (of childhood death threats from my parents). Some new life in me!
Celebrate with me, you are part of my success. Love and thanks to you all, for your support through bad and good times!!
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